Pampering the baby once he is past the age
of 6 to 9 months
At this stage you have to understand that it is essential to
withhold something from the child if doing so is in the child’s best
interests; do not regard that as being cruel to him because you
know what is in his best interests.
For example, a mother who cannot bear
to hear her child crying
even for half a minute may carry him all the time, then when she
wants to do any house work she will find it impossible, because
the child has become more persistent after getting used to his
mother carrying him all the time.
Something similar may be said
concerning the child who
persistently asks his mother for some kinds of food such as candy
and chips.
Dr. ‘Azeezah al-‐Sayyid, Professor of Psychology and Head of the
Social and Psychological Consultation Unit in the Girls’ College of
Ain
Shams University, says:
Excessive pampering may also spoil the child because he has got
used to everyone fulfilling his demands all the time, so he will be
unable to
delay fulfilling his demands, which may lead to
formation of an unstable character that cannot put up with any
pressure or any delay fulfilling its wishes. This will cause him to
make a lot of mistakes and will generate
feelings of selfishness;
he will be unable to form social relationships with others or put
up with responsibilities that he will face in the future; he will
think that everything is permissible and nothing is forbidden. And
when he goes out into the real world
he will not be able to deal
with rules and regulations and he may transgress them.
Dr. ‘Azeezah al-‐Sayyid warns parents against being inconsistent
when dealing with their children, because not being consistent
and alternating between strictness and
leniency will cause a great
deal of confusion in the child.
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