Finish: Give Yourself the Gift of Done pdfdrive com

Real People Using Real Fun in Real Ways
My friend posted on Instagram that she was enjoying a guilty pleasure on a
flight. What was she imbibing? Seltzer water.
That’s right, you freaking heathen, her guilty pleasure is seltzer water—not
even tonic. She’s drinking straight seltzer water. How bad do you feel about
your life choices right now? My guilty pleasures usually involve ignoring a
serving-size suggestion. Have you ever eaten a whole package of something
before you noticed it said “share size” or “party pack”? That party was not

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before you noticed it said “share size” or “party pack”? That party was not
supposed to be just for you.
You know what, though, that’s awesome that my friend rewards herself with
seltzer water. Why? Because fun is supposed to be personal and often that means
it’s weird.
That’s why I lit a balsam and cedar candle when I sat down to write this
chapter. It’s not even December, the official month of balsam and cedar. That’s
like listening to Mariah Carey’s Christmas album in June, but I don’t even care. I
live by my own rules.
I love the smell of balsam. I probably picked it up when I bought an ax I
never really used. The woods change a man, I suppose. Regardless of the origin
of my love, I’m a huge fan of that scent. It smells like Christmas and reindeer
and happiness. So during the writing of this book, I bought a sixty-hour candle at
Yankee Candle. I committed to lighting it only when I was writing this book.
Doing this was also a reminder that most people are not either-or when it
comes to reward and fear motivation. Fear motivates me to prepare my speeches
but a reward encourages me to work hard at my writing.
This was fun for me on two levels. The first is the smell, which is magical,
like a unicorn’s breath. The second is watching the progress of the wax. I really
wanted to get to the bottom of the candle. I envisioned putting the empty jar up
on my shelf when it was finished. I’d stare up at it in victory, knowing that I
single-handedly slayed that candle.
Is that weird? It is. It definitely is.
But that’s not any weirder than going to the gym five days in a row at 5
A.M.
so you can earn a free T-shirt. That’s what scores of people at my gym did
during Hell Week, a weeklong torture fest that ended with a free T-shirt. Along
the way, you got an orange star next to your name on a big board for every day
you completed.
The sticker might feel a bit like kindergarten, but I promise you I saw grown
adults giddy with each one they earned.
Weird works, and perfectionism absolutely hates it. Of course it would. If
it’s opposed to fun, can you imagine how much disregard it has for weirdness?
Perfectionism is about conformity, it’s about twisting and molding your
performance to some imaginary standard that’s impossible to hit. There’s no
room for weird when it comes to perfectionism.
Sometimes, instead of picking between a reward or a loss, you can knock out
two birds with one stone. When Emily Bortz did a weight-loss challenge with
her sister, the loser had to pay for the winner’s massage. In addition to being
motivated by the reward of the massage, you could be motivated by the fear of

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motivated by the reward of the massage, you could be motivated by the fear of
paying for one you weren’t receiving.
OK, we’ve now exhausted our quota of weight-loss examples, but what
about something boring like housework? Here’s how Stephen Nazarian, one of
my readers, approaches it.
“I have a never-ending ‘honey-do’ list around the house. Many of the items
only take fifteen to twenty minutes (like changing some switch plates or hanging
a frame). So, whenever I’m shot from the day and just want to relax in the
Jacuzzi tub, I force myself to start a short task on the list and when I’m almost
done I go turn on the water for the tub and let it fill while I finish. I’ve done this
so much that now I can’t relax in the Jacuzzi without doing something
productive first. Pavlov would be proud.”
Is there anything weirder than using a Jacuzzi to condition yourself to be
more productive? I submit no. That’s why I love Stephen.
The size of the reward can vary as well as the type. I decided one year that
every time I had to go on a business trip, I was going to reward myself by
upgrading the rental car.
In Seattle, I asked the Enterprise guy how much it would cost to upgrade my
car. He looked at his tablet and said, “I can get you from the sewing machine
you currently have rented and into an Infiniti for twenty dollars a day.” In
Charlotte, a brand-new Volvo cost fifteen dollars. In Dallas, a Cadillac was
twenty dollars.
That might not seem like much of a reward, but if you’ve ever traveled for
business, little things like that make all the difference. I was going to spend three
hours in the car in Seattle. Driving a fast, fun model made the trip infinitely
better and cost me twenty dollars.
That was a small reward. When I completed the first draft of this book, I
bought ski boots. I had the money prior to finishing the book, and I could have
purchased them before I completed the goal, but that would have ruined the
reward.
What about the flip side, if you’re motivated by fear? It’s often hard to think
of a punishment version if you don’t hit the goal, but don’t be afraid to get
creative. The cocreator of the show Billions and cowriter of the movie Rounders,
Brian Koppelman, once had a movie script he just couldn’t get financed. People
in the business told him it would be impossible because of the dark subject
matter. The financiers would never go along with his plan and it was a hopeless
situation. Finally, after a few frustrating months, he went to Nike.com and

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designed an incredibly ugly pair of sneakers. Written across them in bright pink
was the name of the movie he was working on. He had to wear the hideous shoes
until he finished. That day he dedicated himself to taking at least one concrete
action each day.
Weird? Sure. But ask Michael Douglas if he liked starring in the movie
Solitary Man, which Brian did get financed.
Radio host David Hooper once hired a career coach who had an interesting
approach to the fear versus reward spectrum. He made Hooper write out a check
that the coach would send to the political party Hooper hated the most if he
didn’t hit his goals. The coach had the check, so the process was automatic. If
David didn’t work on his goal, the candidate he can’t stand would get a little
support. Worst of all, now he’d be on the party’s mailing list, a nightmarish
database you will never escape from, my friend.
What’s your reward going to be? Or if you’re more motivated by fear,
what’s the threat?
Remember, perfectionism will tell you that fun doesn’t count. Even worse, it
will tell you that using rewards or fears as a form of motivation to reach your
goal is a crutch. You’re the only one with stupid, fun, weird systems.
Only you’re not.
Right now, I’m probably practicing a speech somewhere so I don’t bomb.
I’m lighting a candle that smells like the forest so I can keep writing. A stay-at-
home mom is going shopping because she lost the amount of weight that
triggered a reward.
The more fun you add to your goal, be it in the form of fear or reward, the
more likely you’ll actually finish.