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Finish Give Yourself the Gift of Done
I’m just a singer who already blew his shot.
I get along with old timers, Cause my name’s a reminder of a pop song people forgot. Hidden inside this happy, infectious pop song is an honest look at what can happen in the record industry. happen in the record industry. I told my daughter about it and then forgot we ever had that conversation until one day in the car. The song came on and I heard her remark to her friend, “This song is about a guy who had a hit and the fame destroyed him.” She might have used the word “fame,” but I could recognize the start of a cuckoo. Success will destroy you. Success is dangerous. Success is to be avoided. I never said those things to my daughter. My dad never said those things to me either. But cuckoos don’t need much to grow bigger than you could ever imagine. In my own life, the last eight years have been a bit difficult because of that particular lie. I’m not alone in this, as there are many people who struggle with a fear of success. The more successful they get, the guiltier they get, too. A friend at a dinner party once told me, “That CEO of the health-care company makes twenty million dollars a year. I wonder how he sleeps at night?” I wanted to respond, “Probably peacefully on a comforter made of Hungarian down.” He clearly thought success was bad, and that after you’ve made a certain arbitrary amount of income, you were no longer able to sleep well. What’s that line? If you make $5 million, you’re able to sleep at night, but no longer have access to Sunday afternoon naps out of guilt? This cuckoo ends up being a double-edged sword. If I fail, it hurts because failing isn’t fun. If I win, I feel ashamed of the success and that hurts. It’s the very picture of lose-lose. That’s how you know you’re dealing with a cuckoo, when either outcome makes you unhappy. Rob’s back and shoulder hurt lugging around difficult suitcases, but using one with wheels made him feel like a failure. There was no middle ground. I can teach you a million strategies and tricks, but if you’re bringing them home to a nest chock-full of parasites, none of it matters. To deal with our secret rules, we have to do three things: 1. Identify them. 2. Destroy them. 3. Replace them. Let’s start with figuring out what they are. |
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