Maggie.
After learning to let Jeff have his distance or "space," Maggie discovered that he did come back.
She practiced not running after him when he would withdraw and trusted that everything was
OK. Each time he did come back.
As her trust in this process grew, it became easier for her not to panic. When he pulled away
she did not run after him or even think something was wrong. She accepted this part of Jeff.
The more she just accepted him at those times the sooner he would return. As Jeff began to
understand his changing feelings and needs, he became more confident in his love. He was
able to make a commitment. The secret of Maggie and Jeffs success was that they understood
and accepted that men are like rubber bands.
HOW WOMEN MISINTERPRET MEN
Without an understanding of how men are like rubber bands, it Is very easy for women to
misinterpret a man's reactions. A common confusion arises when she says "Let's talk" and
immediately he emotionally distances himself. Right when she wants to open up and get closer,
he wants to pull away. Commonly I hear the complaint "Every time I want to talk, he pulls
away. I feel like he doesn't care about me." She mistakenly concludes that he doesn't ever want
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to talk to her.
This rubber band analogy explains how a man may care very much about his partner but
suddenly pull away. When he pulls away it is not because he does not want to talk. Instead, he
needs some time alone; time to be with himself when he is not responsible for anyone else. It is
a time for him to take care of himself. When he returns then he is available to talk.
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