Shepherding a Child's Heart

Application Questions for Chapter 2
1. What have been some of the prominent shaping influences of
your child’s life?
2. What is the structure of your family? How has that affected
your son or daughter?
3. What would your children identify as the values of your
family? What are the things that matter most to you?

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4. Where are the secrets in your home? Do you share too much
and thus burden your children with problems too big for them? Do
you share too little and thus insulate them from life and dependence
on God?
5.
Who is the boss in your home? Is there a centralized
authority, or does your family make decisions by committee?
6.
What are the patterns for conflict resolution? How have
these patterns affected each of your children? Is change warranted? If
so, what change?
7. What constitutes success or failure in your home?
8. What events have been pivotal in your family history? How
have these events affected you? How have they affected your
children?
9.
Do you tend to be a determinist in the way you look at
childrearing? Are you able to see that your children are active
responders to the shaping influences in their lives? How do you see
them responding?

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Chapter 3
Your Child’s Development: Godward Orientation
As a college student, I received my first exposure to sailing. I
recall my amazement to learn that the direction of the craft is not
determined by the direction of the breeze, but by the trim of the sail.
In a sense, Godward orientation is like the set of the sail in a child’s
life. Whatever the shaping influences of life, it is the child’s Godward
orientation that determines his response to those shaping influences.
Proverbs 9:7–10 contrasts the mocker’s and the wise man’s
responses to rebuke and instruction: “Whoever corrects a mocker
invites insult; whoever rebukes a wicked man incurs abuse. Do not
rebuke a mocker or he will hate you; rebuke a wise man and he will
love you. Instruct a wise man and he will be wiser still; teach a
righteous man and he will add to his learning. The fear of the Lord is
the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is
understanding.” Verse 10 helps us see what ultimately determines
whether a child responds as a mocker or a wise man. It is the fear of
the Lord that makes one wise and it is that wisdom that determines
how he responds to the correction.