Stories of Your Life and Others

Tamera Lyons:
I know how this is going to sound, but… well, I'm thinking about
getting my calli turned back on.
In a way, it's because of that PEN video. I don't mean I'm getting calli
just because makeup companies don't want people to and I'm angry at them.
That's not it. But it's hard to explain.
I am angry at them, because they used a trick to manipulate people;
they weren't playing fair. But what it made me realize was, I was doing the
same kind of thing to Garrett. Or I wanted to, anyway. I was trying to use
my looks to win him back. And in a way that's not playing fair, either.
I don't mean that I'm as bad as the advertisers are! I love Garrett, and
they just want to make money. But remember when I was talking about
beauty as a kind of magic spell? It gives you an advantage, and I think it's
very easy to misuse something like that. And what calli does is make a
person immune to that sort of spell. So I figure I shouldn't mind if Garrett
would rather be immune, because I shouldn't be trying to gain an advantage
in the first place. If I get him back, I want it to be by playing fair, by him
loving me for myself.
I know, just because he got his calli turned back on doesn't mean that I
have to. I've really been enjoying seeing what faces look like. But if

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Garrett's going to be immune, I feel like I should be too. So we're even, you
know? And if we do get back together, maybe we'll get those new spex
they're talking about. Then we can turn off our calli when we're by
ourselves, just the two of us.
And I guess calli makes sense for other reasons, too. Those makeup
companies and everyone else, they're just trying to create needs in you that
you wouldn't feel if they were playing fair, and I don't like that. If I'm going
to be dazzled watching a commercial, it'll be when I'm in the mood, not
whenever they spring it on me. Although I'm not going to get those other
agnosias, like that tonal one, not yet anyway. Maybe once those new spex
come out.
This doesn't mean I agree with my parents' having me grow up with
calli. I still think they were wrong; they thought getting rid of beauty would
help make a utopia, and I don't believe that at all. Beauty isn't the problem,
it's how some people are misusing it that's the problem. And that's what
calli's good for; it lets you guard against that. I don't know, maybe this
wasn't a problem back in my parents' day. But it's something we have to
deal with now.

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