The Happiest Baby on the Block and The Happiest Toddler on the Block 2-Book Bundle pdfdrive com

Yellow-Light Behaviors: Annoying Little
Things Your Child Says and Does
In the next chapter, I’ll teach you how to put the kibosh on really
bad (red-light) behaviors. But in this chapter we’ll be talking about
the dozens of toddler shenanigans that are not terrible … just
terribly annoying. These are the yellow-light behaviors: whining,
begging, clinging, pouting, interrupting, teasing, dawdling,
grabbing, yanking, screeching, fussing, and mild defiance, to name a
few!
Like a tiny pebble in your shoe, yellow-light behaviors can bug
the heck out of you, especially if you are tired or stressed. Your
child’s annoying and defiant behavior may call up bad memories
from your own childhood, causing you to overreact and your temper
to flare.
Fortunately, the four simple skills mentioned above can quickly
turn these minor conflicts back into cooperation. Study them well. I
predict you’ll use them daily for years to come.

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Yellow-Light Skill #1: Connect
with Respect
It’s not just what you say, it’s how you say it.
Many parents, wanting put a quick end to their child’s whining and
defiance, try to stop their behavior with:
• distraction—“Hey, look at this!”
• ridicule—“Don’t be such a baby!”
• threats—“Stop now or I will stop you!”
• yelling—“Stooooop! ”
While these responses may seem like the fastest way to stop the
nagging, they can often backfire and quickly escalate the fight from
whining to screaming, spitting, and scratching.
Like the mom and dad in the next cartoon, we all want to reach
the treasure chest of good behavior as fast as possible. But parents
who think they can go straight for it risk falling right off the cliff.

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Splat! We can all have well-behaved, respectful children, but the
only sure way of achieving that is to stay on the path of good
parenting. This takes a bit more effort at first, but it will save you
tons of time as your child’s yellow-light behaviors end faster and
occur less often.
As you can see in the cartoon, the journey to good behavior starts
with two skills you’ve already learned: the Fast-Food Rule and
Toddler-ese. Echoing your child’s feelings (using the Fast-Food Rule)
with short phrases, repetition, and mirroring (the essence of
Toddler-ese) often ends annoying behavior fast because it
acknowledges the underlying reason for the child’s misbehavior:
frustration, fatigue, disappointment, boredom, etc.
What It Is:
Connecting with respect means using the Fast-Food
Rule +Toddler-ese Chapters (
3
and
4
) to show your child that you

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can see the world from her perspective and you really care about
her feelings. Then, once she starts to settle, it’s your turn to
respectfully redirect her (by offering options, distracting, giving
what she wants in fantasy, etc.).