13 Things Mentally Strong People Don\'t Do: Take Back Your Power, Embrace Change, Face Your Fears, and Train Your Brain for Happiness and Success pdfdrive com

THE PROBLEM WITH FEARING RISK
Once Dale’s children had all graduated from college, he wanted to do more
exciting things with his life. When he thought about opening a business,

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however, he felt like he’d be jumping off a cliff without a safety harness. What
Dale didn’t calculate was the emotional toll that avoiding risk was having on
him. Not following his dream affected his mood because it changed the way he
thought about himself and the way he felt about his teaching job.
YOU DON’T GET TO BE EXTRAORDINARY WITHOUT
TAKING CALCULATED RISKS
Othmar Ammann was a Swiss-born engineer who immigrated to the United
States. He started out as the chief engineer to the Port Authority of New York
and within seven years, they promoted him to director of engineering. By all
accounts, he had an important job.
But for as long as he could remember, Ammann had dreamed of becoming an
architect. So he left his coveted job and set out to open his own business. In the
years that followed, Ammann contributed to some of the most impressive
American bridges, including the Verrazano-Narrows, the Delaware Memorial,
and the Walt Whitman. His ability to design and create ornate, complicated, and
extravagant structures earned him multiple awards.
Most impressive of all might be that Ammann was sixty years old when he
switched careers. He continued to create architectural masterpieces right up until
he was eighty-six. At an age when most people don’t want to take any more
risks, Ammann chose to take a calculated risk that allowed him to live his dream.
If we only take risks that make us the most comfortable, we’re likely missing out
on some great opportunities. Taking calculated risks often mean the difference
between living a mediocre life and living an extraordinary life.
EMOTION INTERFERES WITH MAKING LOGICAL CHOICES
You should have some fear about stepping into traffic. That fear reminds you
that you should look both ways before you cross the road, so you can reduce the
risk that you’ll get hit by a car. If you didn’t have any fear, you’d likely behave
recklessly.
But our “fear meters” aren’t always reliable. They sometimes go off even

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when we’re not in any actual danger. And when we feel afraid, we tend to
behave accordingly, falsely believing “If it feels scary, it must be too risky.”
For years, we’ve been warned against the dangers of anything from killer bees
to mad cow disease. It seems like we’re constantly hearing various statistics,
research studies, and warnings about so many perils that it becomes difficult to
decipher the extent of danger we actually face in our lives. Take the research
about cancer, for example. Some studies estimate cancer accounts for nearly one
of every four deaths and other reports warn that within a few years about half of
us will have cancer. Although those types of statistics can be a cause for alarm,
they can often be misleading. A closer look at the numbers reveals a young
healthy person who maintains a healthy lifestyle has a relatively low risk of
developing cancer compared to an older, overweight person who smokes. But
sometimes it’s hard to put our personal level of risk into perspective when we’re
constantly bombarded with such frightening statistics.
Manufacturers of cleaning solutions have worked hard to convince us we need
powerful chemicals, hand sanitizers, and antibacterial soaps to protect ourselves
from germs. Media stories warn us that our kitchen countertops have more
germs than our toilet seats as we’re given visual reminders of how fast bacteria
grows in a petri dish. Germaphobic people heed these warnings by taking drastic
precautions to combat the risk of coming into contact with germs. They sanitize
their homes daily with caustic chemicals, scrub their hands repeatedly with
antibacterial products, and replace handshakes with fist bumps to reduce the
spread of germs. But attempts to win the war on germs may actually do more
harm than good. In fact, there’s research that shows getting rid of too many
germs reduces our ability to build immunity from illness. A study from Johns
Hopkins Children’s Center found that newborns who were exposed to germs, pet
and rodent dander, and roach allergens were less likely to develop asthma and
allergies. Fear leads many people to incorrectly assume that germs pose a much
higher risk than they actually do, because in the reality, bacteria-free
environments may pose a greater threat to our health than the germs.
It’s important to be aware of your emotions throughout the decision-making
process. If you’re feeling sad, you’re likely to anticipate failure and avoid the
risk. If you’re feeling happy, you may disregard the risk and forge ahead. There’s
even research that shows that fear of something completely unrelated to the risk

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can influence your decision. If you’re stressed about your job, and you’re also
considering purchasing a new home, you’ll be more likely to view that home
purchase as a bigger risk than if you weren’t feeling stressed at work. Often,
we’re not good at separating what factors are influencing our feelings so we
lump them all together.