Clients‟ experience of counselling within a narrative framework

6.5.3 Fighting containment-freedom 
In week 26 of her journal Alice seems to demonstrate her fight to own her feelings while her 
fight for the freedom to do this seems to be expressed in her use of colour. She seems to want to 
change by being more assertive yet the passive feel in the writing suggests that part of her 
struggles to consider such change: 

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172 
Extract 40. From a journal to show fighting containment-freedom. 
Line 1.
Felt free to reflect on last session 
Line 2
.
Felt safe 
Line 3.
Anger needs to be expressed for it
Line 4.
to go away.
Line 5.
Helps others and me if I am
Line 6
.
assertive. 
Line 7.
Visualising something can help 
Line 8.
make it happen. 
The entry stands out from all the others because it is in red. The passion of red (of the Beast who 
can be angry) is seen in the colour of the words yet when read the words sound passive as if the 
battle within her to own her anger is made visible on the page. The interpretation of the entry 
looks at the use of colour: 
Extract 41. From the analysis to show the use of colour. 
Whereas the rest of the journal is written in blue, black ink or pencil, this one entry is in red. 
Perhaps there was a desire to express anger (line 3.) – to be the Beast - that was stronger than the 
client realized. It also seems possible that the red colour helped her to visualise (line 7.) her 
anger almost making it visible on the page. By writing in red she may also have a sense of 
making something happen (line 8.) as if she is making the anger happen. It seems she has done 
some processing during the break for she feels free enough to reflect on the last session (line 1.). 
She also feels safe (line 2.) as if there has been a shift in her ability contain her own feelings. She 
recognises that anger needs to be expressed (line 3.), but this does not feel the same as owning it, 
letting it be hers. She feels that if it is expressed, anger goes away (line 4.) so perhaps this is just 
another way of momentarily getting rid of it rather than owning it. It is as if she both wants 
power, in the anger, but also wants rid of it. She seems to connect anger with being assertive as 
she goes on to say that it helps her and others if she is assertive (lines 5 and 6.) which is a good 

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173 
illustration of the Beast. Perhaps she needs to visualize (line 7.) being assertive, or even angry in 
order to make it happen. But it feels as if this takes away her spontaneity and enables her to keep 
her sense of control. Using the red ink on the other hand may have been a spontaneous action, 
even an unconscious action so perhaps a part of her was owning her anger. 
The category fighting containment-freedom was chosen because she seems to want to have her 
anger and not have it. She does not own it, yet she seems to unconsciously express it in the 
colour red. It is as if she lets a part of her Beast out by writing in red but then denies this self by 
writing about it as opposed to owning it.
In week 19 of her journal Little Girl seems very angry as if she has found her Beast: 
Extract 42. From a journal to show anger. 
Line 1. I SEE ME 
Line 2. AND I KNOW 
Line 3. WHO I AM 
Line 4. AND IF YOU 
Line 5. ONLY SEE 
Line 6. THE ME I WAS 
Line 7. HOW SAD 
Line 8. I HAVE LEFT YOU 
Line 9. BEHIND 
The interpretation of the entry tries to uncover what the anger is about, to discover whether she is 
expressing her anger or using it as a defence against hidden feelings. To just presume what the 
category is would mean that a great deal of understanding would be lost for although this appears 
to be an angry entry it is also important to discover what that anger may be about and whether it 
is owned or repressed: 

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174 
Extract 43. From the analysis to show what the anger is about.
The client appears to be reflecting on who she was and is. Although she appears to be writing to 
another, it seems that she is also talking to different parts of herself using the first and second 
person. She sees herself (line 1) and she knows who she is (lines 2,3). But she tells herself that if 
this other part of her only sees her as who she used to be (lines 4,5,6) that it is sad (line 7), 
because a part of her has been left behind (lines 8,9). It seems that the client wants to hold onto 
all of herself and not leave any part behind. It feels as if she really wants to integrate all aspects 
of herself, -like the marriage of Beauty and the Beast - while at the same time realizing that this 
might not be possible. This also feels like an angry statement, as if part of her really wants to 
take charge, and be in control. It is possible that this entry is also addressed to the counsellor, and 
perhaps this is the client‟s way of getting ready to end the counselling, and she wants to be seen 
as changed and capable. It may also show distrust of the counsellor. Her anger perhaps defends 
against being held by the counsellor or being dependant upon her. 
Little girl does appear to be fighting containment-freedom whether she is speaking to herself 
and/or the counsellor. It feels she fights against owning her own feelings and fights against being 
dependant on the counsellor. Fighting containment-freedom appears to demonstrate the struggle 
for a client to own their own affect and to own their dependence on the counselling. But it is this 
tension between opposing feelings that seems to enable movement through opposition in that 
once the choice becomes conscious there is a greater possibility of change.