Clients‟ experience of counselling within a narrative framework
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Beauty and the Beast ( PDFDrive )
8.9.3 Poetry and opposition
Keats (1966) in his poems „Ode on a Grecian Urn‟ and „The Nightingale Ode‟ brings together the opposites of life and death, joy and sorrow. Hilton (1971) sees the melancholy of Keats poems as: “not just a „fit‟, nor is it a mood, but rather a state of mind in which these opposites may be brought together” (Hilton 1971:106). Poets throughout history to the modern day bring opposites together in their work. It seems that the reflexive space provided by writing enables poets to achieve this melancholic state of mind which encourages the possibility of exploring opposites. The participants seem to demonstrate this state of mind in their journals as they bring opposites together. Wriggling Fish tends to demonstrate opposition in many entries but in entry twelve there is opposition in just a few lines: Extract 54. From WF journal to show opposition Line 1. Week „off‟ - glad. Line 2. Neck pain, confined! Line 3. Cannot drive. Line 4. Turmoil / emotional Line 5. New Zealand and life calling! 247 Although she is glad at the beginning because she has a week off from counselling the next three lines are about pain, her inability to drive and emotional turmoil. This gives the impression of a distressed or unhappy way of being, yet in the last line she seems full of optimism and the adventure of life. There is discomfort felt in the opposition as if the entry does not make sense. But perhaps it can be understood by her forthcoming move to another country. This may be what she wants in her external life, but perhaps she also wants to move this much internally, to get rid of the restrictive neck pain and find the freedom of her own feelings. Alice has several entries which show opposition and seem to embody her sadness but also her desire for change. It seems that feeling opposition in the world and in herself enables her to learn about herself: Extract 55. From A journal to show opposition Line 1. Sea Saw Line 2. Want what I can‟t have, Line 3. don‟t want it when I can have it. Line 4. Control and out of control Line 5. How to find the right balance? Line 6. Got to know plant Line 7. Feel I‟m getting closer. There is a real sense of the up and down movement of the sea saw, the swing between opposite desires. Feeling and being aware of internal opposition seems to make her wonder about finding the right balance. This appears to take her away from the movement for balance may be seen as being still. She goes further away by writing about a plant that was in the counselling room but ends up feeling she is getting closer, perhaps to herself. But the real movement of the entry 248 seems to be in the first four lines and this is what opposition, with its melancholy, seems to give to the process of exploring the self. Turned On moves in her journal between feeling confused and feeling that her thoughts get clearer. In the first five lines of her first entry she shows this confusion: Extract 56. From TO journal to show opposition Lin1 1. This seemed to be a very Line 2. confused session for me Line 3. today back into deep family Line 4. difficulties and feel not Line 5. worthy. Have to prove myself She seems to have returned to a place that she has been before, deep into family difficulties which appear to make her feel unworthy. Yet immediately afterwards it seems she has to prove herself which feels the opposite of being unworthy. She berates herself regularly through the journal and appears to be seeking to like/love herself and these opposing states seems to help her move emotionally. But there is always the feeling of melancholy with such opposing feelings as she finds a state of mind that enables such opposition to be felt. Little Girl seems to see herself as a little girl when she writes out the childhood rhyme „There was a little girl‟. Yet in week seventeen she declares „I am not Bambi‟ as if she is saying the opposite. This moving between feeling very young and very grown up is a constant part of her journal. She is so very grown up in the way she writes with such accomplishment that opposition feels inherent throughout the journal. In week eight she writes: 249 Extract 57. From LG journal to show inherent opposition Line 1. SO MANY WORDS Line 2. BUT NOTHING TO SAY Line 3. AS IF Line 4. BY TALKING Line 5. YOU CAN HIDE Line 6. WHAT IS REAL. It seems that there have been many words in the counselling session yet she feels that nothing has been said. The opposition here feels encased in sadness for the talking seems to hide what is real as if her reality has been hidden by all the words. Her reality feels hidden here and yet so present in the embodied sadness. Opposition in the journal of Who Am I seems hidden yet it is felt. It is particularly felt in the sadness or melancholy of her entries: Extract 58. From WAI journal to show melancholy Line 1. Tired, exhausted, virus. Line 2. Irritable bowel playing up, Line 3. tension + stress shoulder, neck Line 4. pain. Line 5. Feel want to be left alone to Line 6. do nothing. Here she seems to state very clearly that her physical body is holding her feelings. She wants to be left alone to do nothing, yet she does not leave herself alone for she still writes which is doing 250 something as opposed to nothing. If Hilton (1971) is correct and it is a melancholic state of mind that enables opposition to come into focus for the creative writer, then it makes sense of my writing following trauma and the sadness I felt when analysing the journals. It was embodied within me, just as it is in the journal writers. 8.10 Conclusion The participants‟ journals exceeded all my expectations and provided a wealth of material that even now seems only partially used for the study. There is so much that may be linked to counselling theory and poetry that I feel as if I have only scratched the surface of all that may be embodied in the narratives. However the fact that established theory appears to be visible in the journals does confirm that theory may be deduced from the client‟s perspective. The journals also seem to provide a way of looking at the process of internal growth from object relations through the restoration of the self to a more modern view of multiple selves. The similarities between the poetic space and the counselling space where the individual/client may discover a safe place where the unconscious may emerge is intriguing. It makes sense of my desire to enable the participants to use poetic skills without actually asking them to write poetry. |
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