John Gray – Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus Scanned by nova scanner: Canoscan D1250 U2f software: Omnipage Pro 9 Date: 28 August 2002 Proofed by


willing to be supported. Response Letters ensure that a person is open to being supported


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Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus

willing to be supported. Response Letters ensure that a person is open to being supported. 
Otherwise communication cannot work. To share hurt feelings with an attitude that says 


132 
"Nothing you say can make me feel better" is not only counterproductive but also hurtful to 
your partner. It is better not to talk at these times. 
 
Here is an example of a Love Letter and its Response Letter. Notice that the response is still 
under the P.S., but it's a bit longer and more detailed than those above. 
 
A Love Letter and Response Letter About His Resistance 
 
When Theresa asks her husband, Paul, for support, he resists her and appears burdened by her 
requests. 
 
 
Dear Paul, 
 
1. Anger.. I am angry that you resist me. I am angry that you do not offer to help me. I am angry 
that I always have to ask. I do so much for you. I need your help. 
 
2. Sadness.. I am sad that you don't want to help Me. I am sad because I feel so alone. I want to 
do more things together. I miss your support. 
 
3. Fear.. I am afraid to ask for your help. I am afraid of your anger. I am afraid you will say no 
and then I will be hurt. 
 
4. Regret.. I am sorry that I resent you so much. I am sorry that I nag you and criticize you. I am 
sorry I don't appreciate you more. I am sorry I give too much and then demand you do the 
same. 
 
5. Love.. I love you. I understand you are doing your best. I know you do care about me. I want 
to ask you in more loving ways. You are such a loving father to our children. 

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