focused on solving this one problem that he temporarily loses awareness of everything else.
Other problems and responsibilities fade into the background.
At such times, he becomes increasingly distant, forgetful, unresponsive, and preoccupied in his
relationships. For example, when having a conversation with him at home, it seems as if only 5
percent of his mind is available for the relationship while the other 95 percent is still at work.
His full awareness is not present because he is mulling over his problem, hoping to find a
solution. The more stressed he is the more gripped by the problem he will be. At such times he
is incapable of giving a woman the attention and feeling that she normally receives and
certainly deserves. Flis mind is preoccupied, and he is powerless to release it. If, however, he
can find a solution, instantly he Will feel much better and come out of his cave; suddenly he is
available for being in a relationship again.
However, if he cannot find a solution to his problem, then he remains stuck in the cave. To get
unstuck he is drawn to solving little problems, like reading the news, watching TV, driving his
car, doing physical exercise, watching a football game, playing basketball, and so forth. Any
challenging activity that initially requires only 5 percent of his mind can assist him in
forgetting his problems and becoming unstuck. Then the next day he can redirect his focus to
his problem with greater success.
Let's explore in greater detail a few examples. Jim commonly uses reading the newspaper to
forget his problems. When he reads the paper he is no longer being confronted with the
problems of his day. With the 5 percent of his mind that is not focused on his work problems,
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