Minutes a day n e w y o r k

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R E V I S I N G   PA R A G R A P H S
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Introductions and Conclusions
Both of these paragraphs must fulfill specific duties within the essay. While you’re revising, you’ll need to look
closely at them to make certain they function properly.
As you reread your introduction, ask:
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Does it provide the context needed to understand my thesis?
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Does it clearly state the main point of my essay?
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Does it set the tone for the essay?
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Does it grab my reader’s interest?
Notice how the introduction to lying with silence accomplishes each of these four tasks. It provides context
by quoting Adrienne Rich’s claim about silent deceptions. It clearly states the thesis in the last two sentences. It
also sets the tone by using words like deceives and devastating, which will be repeated in the essay. In addition, it
grabs the audience’s attention by beginning with a thought-provoking question.
As you reread your conclusion, ask:
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Does it restate my thesis in a new way?
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Does it offer a new understanding?
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Does it provide a sense of closure?
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Does it arouse my reader’s emotions?
While the lying with silence essay does a good job with the introduction, its conclusion needs work. Notice
how it simply restates the thesis instead of putting it in different words. It does offer a new understanding, but goes
too far by introducing a contentious new issue instead of providing a sense of closure.