Shepherding a Child's Heart

Mixed Signals
Psalm 36 asserts that it is only in his light that we see light. We,
however, present a different world to our children. In our attempt to
help them adapt to a culture that does not know God, we present
objectives to pursue and ways of solving life’s problems that are
unbiblical. In effect, we train them to think unbiblically. These
unbiblical patterns of thought and habits of action are at cross
purposescross-purposes with life lived for the glory of God.
For example, if you teach your child to obey and to perform for
approval from you and from others, you present an unbiblical
objective. God says we should do all for his glory, because his eye is
upon us and he is the rewarder of the just. People will respond well to
a child who obeys, but you cannot make that secondary benefit of
obedience the primary reason for obeying.
Another example may be helpful. What advice do you give your
child when she is confronted with abusive children on the school bus?
Many parents would urge their child to fight fire with fire, to follow

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the return-evil-with-evil pattern. Some parents teach their child to
ignore a bully. But is either advice biblical? Not really. God says to
return good for evil, all the while entrusting ourselves to the
protective care of a God who says, “It is mine to avenge; I will repay”
(Romans 12:19).
Biblical counsel leads your children to entrust themselves to
God’s care and protection. It teaches sensitivity to the needs of the
offender. “If your enemy is hungry, feed him” (Romans 12:20). It
reminds her that God says to bless those who curse us. In short, it is
counsel that can only function in the context of biblical revelation.
This counsel directs the child to God and not to his own resources.
In the next chapter we will re-think these goals in light of the
chief end of man.