Table of contents introduction

Negotiation is the process of settling a conflict by facilitating understand­ing between the disputing parties. The negotiation process involves each dis­puting party listening carefully to the other party and then reaching some compromise.
A related means of overcoming conflict is mediation, the process of finding peaceful solutions to a conflict through a neutral, third party intervention. The mediation process is confidential and private. First, one of the disputants is asked to describe the conflict. The mediator then summarizes this side of the story. The other disputant then describes the conflict from the other point of view. Again the mediator summarizes the main points. Then the two par­ties identify the main issues of contention, which are listed by the mediator. The two disputants decide which issue to begin resolving, usually starting with the easiest. When all of the issues have been discussed and settled (if possible), the mediator puts an agreement in writing that the two parties each sign. The agreement specifies exactly who will do what in order to resolve the conflict.
The mediation process is nonbinding in that the participants are not forced to accept the mediated resolution of their conflict. The purpose of mediation is to provide each side of a conflict with an improved understand­ing of the other party's point of view and thus to resolve issues before they escalate into a legal dispute or a more serious type of conflict. Mediation is more difficult when the parties in conflict do not share a common culture. Reaching an understanding is more difficult when cultural differences divide the two parties.
The mediation process, as described above, may have limited application in cultures other than European American. For example, the success of the mediation process rests on the willingness of the two disputants to engage in direct communication about the conflict. In many cultures, however, conflict­ing parties prefer to deal through intermediaries, rather than to meet directly. Individuals in some cultures (such as collectivistic cultures) are more relational-oriented, rather than task-oriented, and would fear the loss of face if they participated in a mediation process. Further, certain cultures may doubt that a neutral, fair mediator could exist. Most experts on mediation believe that we have far to go toward achieving a mediation process that is not culturally limited.
Resolving conflict is the final measure of how competent we are as com­municators. Some conflicts may never be resolved. One of the reasons for that negative prognosis is that the emotions attached to most conflicts often over­ride much of the knowledge we have learned about communicating with oth­ers—alike or unalike. If we develop a habit of viewing behavior with an open, flexible approach, we have a better opportunity to apply the communication skills most likely to lead to an understanding with others.