The 50th Law (with 50 Cent)

Understand: Although there are no longer powerful kings and
queens in our midst, more of us than ever operate as if we consider
ourselves royalty. We feel entitled to respect for our work, no matter
how little we have actually accomplished. We feel people should take
our ideas and projects seriously, no matter how little thought went into
them or how meager our track record. We expect people to help us in
our careers, because we are sincere and have the best intentions. Some
of this modern form of entitlement might come from being especially
spoiled by our parents, who made us feel that anything we did was
golden. Some of it might come from the technology that so dominates
our lives and spoils us as well. It gives us immense powers without our
having to exert any real effort. We have come to take such powers for
granted and expect everything in life to be so fast and easy.
Whatever the cause, it infects all of us, and we must see this sense of
entitlement as a curse. It makes us ignore the reality—people have no

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inherent reason to trust or respect us just because of who we are. It
makes us lazy and contented with the slightest idea or the first draft of
our work. Why do we have to raise our game or strain to improve
ourselves when we feel we are already so great? It makes us insensitive
and self-absorbed. By feeling that others owe us trust and respect, we
negate their willpower, their ability to judge for themselves, and this is
infuriating. We may not see it, but we inspire resentment.
And if we become leaders or subleaders, the effect of this curse only
gets worse. Unconsciously, we tend to sit back and expect people to
come to us with their loyalty and respect for the high position we
occupy. We grow defensive and prickly if our ideas are challenged,
putting our intelligence and wisdom into question, even on the
smallest of matters. We expect certain perks and privileges, and if
there are sacrifices to be made, we somehow feel we should be
exempted. If we make a mistake, it is always the fault of someone else,
or circumstances, or some momentary inner demon beyond our
control. We are never really to blame.
We are not aware of how this affects those whom we lead, because
we notice only people’s smiles and nods of approval at what we say.
But they see through us. They feel the entitlement we project, and over
time it diminishes their respect and disconnects them from our
influence. At a certain tipping point, they may turn against us with a
suddenness that is shocking.
Like Elizabeth, we must realize that we are actually in a weak
position, and we must struggle to adopt the opposite attitude: We
expect nothing from the people around us, from those whom we lead.
We are not defensive or sitting back but completely active—everything
we get from others, and most definitely their respect, must be earned.
We have to continually prove ourselves. We have to show that our
primary consideration is not ourselves and our sensitive egos but the
welfare of the group. We must be responsive and truly empathetic to
people’s moods, but with limits—to those who show themselves to be
mostly self-promoting, we are tough and merciless. We practice what
we preach, working harder than others, sacrificing our own interests if
necessary, and being accountable for any mistakes. We expect the
members of the group to follow our lead and prove themselves in
return.

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With such an attitude, we will notice a very different effect. People
will open themselves to our influence; as we move toward them, they
move toward us. They want to win our approval and respect. With such
an emotional connection, we are more easily forgiven for mistakes. The
group energy is not squandered on endless infighting and the clashing
of egos but is directed toward reaching goals and accomplishing great
things. And in achieving such results, we can forge an aura of authority
and power that only grows with time. What we say and do seems to
carry extra weight, and our reputation precedes us.
That . . . is the road to the obedience of compulsion. But there is a shorter
way to a nobler goal, the obedience of the will. When the interests of
mankind are at stake, they will obey with joy the man whom they believe to
be wiser than themselves. You may prove this on all sides: you may see how
the sick man will beg the doctor to tell him what he ought to do, how a
whole ship’s company will listen to the pilot.
—Xenophon