The Happiest Baby on the Block and The Happiest Toddler on the Block 2-Book Bundle pdfdrive com


“Ball! Ball! Ball! You both want it! You want it now!


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The Happiest Baby on the Block and The Happiest Toddler on the Block

“Ball! Ball! Ball! You both want it! You want it now!
You say mine!! My ball!” Then as they quieted for a
second and looked at her, she said, “But noooo! No
fighting, or Mommy takes ball away. Balls are for
sharing.” Then she offered a fun distraction, “Hey! I’ve
got an idea! Let’s all roll the ball together!”


sharing.” Then she offered a fun distraction, “Hey! I’ve
got an idea! Let’s all roll the ball together!”
Maura got them rolling it back and forth and then left
them alone. Two minutes later, they were squabbling
again. And again, she echoed their frustration. “Ball!
Ball! You both want ball. But Mommy says, ‘No
fight … no fight!’ So the ball has to go night-night. Say,
‘Bye-bye, ball. See you later.’ ”
Despite their protests, Maura put the ball out of reach
and said, “Come on, you rugrats! Let’s have a race to the
kitchen and we’ll have a little snack. Do you want cheese
or maybe some yummy mud?”
What It Is:
If time-out is like going to jail, giving a fine is like, well,
being fined. It’s a “take-charge” consequence that targets your toddler’s
growing love of freedom and ownership.
Giving a fine penalizes your tot by removing a valued privilege or toy.
Make the punishment related to the misconduct. In other words, if he
defies you by playing basketball in the house, remove the ball for a
while. (Penalties that connect the punishment to the misbehavior are
also called logical consequences.)
Best Used For:
Toddlers two and up (especially three and up).
How It Works:
Simple! If your child ignores your warning or
repeatedly breaks an important rule, remove a privilege or possession
that’s directly linked to the misbehavior.
If your toddler conks a friend with his toy bat, take the bat away and
end the playdate. Say, “No hit! No hit … no bat when you hit. Now we
go home.”
When you take away a privilege, tell your child you know how much
she wants it, but what she’s doing is not okay. For example, if your
three-year-old refuses to stop tossing crackers to the dog, remove the
crackers and say, “You like to see Rusty eat crackers, but crackers are for
people … not dogs. Mommy said, ‘Stop, no, no, no!’ but Eleanor didn’t


listen to Mommy’s words, so … bye-bye crackers. No crackers for dogs.
Now you can get down and play.”
In another example, if your two-year-old keeps dumping buckets of
sand out of the sandbox after being warned to stop, remove him from
the sandbox and say, “Mommy said, ‘No dump sand! No dump sand!’ It’s
a mess! So say, ‘Bye-bye sand!’ No more sandbox. Let’s wash hands.
… Do you want to dry your hands on one piece of paper or two?”
Sometimes the “prized possession” you remove is … you. This is using
kind ignoring as a fine: “Mommy doesn’t like it when you say those
words. They don’t make me laugh. They hurt my ears. I’m going to the
kitchen and I’ll be back in a little bit when you remember your nice
words.”
Once your toddler stops the negative behavior, do a little something
that is fun to feed his meter and show him that good things happen
when he follows the rules. Later, you might gossip to Daddy on the
phone about when he did good listening and stopped when Mommy said
stop.
If your child misbehaves in the same way every day, take a calm
moment to discuss the fine you will be forced to give if he ignores your
warning: “Honey, remember when you were playing with your ball in
the house and Mommy said ‘No!’? Well, the next time you bounce the
ball in the house, Mommy has to take the ball away for a whole day.”
Give your child extra chances to learn this lesson by role-playing with
his dolls. (Have the Mommy doll tell the little boy doggie what you want
him to do.)
Spanking: How Not to Punish a Toddler
When you’re angry, clap … don’t slap.
Violence is a huge problem in our country. And it has its roots in the
home. After all, our toddlers imitate most things we do. If we eat with
our fingers, they’ll imitate. If we whistle while we work, they’ll try to do
that. So if we hit them when we don’t like their actions, what do you


think they learn from that?
Hitting children teaches them that it’s okay for big people to hit little
people and that it’s okay to vent anger through violence. Is that really
what you want your child to learn? And what sense does it make to
spank kids to punish them for hitting? We don’t teach children not to
spit by spitting at them, do we?
Toddlers get spanked and slapped more than any other age group.
Now, I know there will be times when your toddler will make you really
mad. But when that happens, please clap … don’t slap. Vent your anger
by clapping and growling, not by shaking and slapping.
We expect our little toddler cave-kids to act primitive, but we can do
better.

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