Twisted Hate: An Enemies with Benefits Romance

I didn’t deserve it.
I just had to get out of my own way.
Any interest I had in continuing drinks with Asher dissipated into dust.
“I’m so sorry, but—”
“Go.” He waved me off. “I had a feeling our night would be cut short.

---

And I’m ninety percent sure my cover is blown, so save yourself while you
can.”
I followed his gaze and spotted two men beelining toward us, their eyes
fixed on Asher with the enthusiasm of overzealous fans.
Yikes. “Good luck.”
Asher laughed. “Thanks for that, and for keeping me company for a few
hours. If you’re ever in Manchester, let me know.”
“I will.”
I got out of there right as the men reached our table.
“Are you Asher Donovan?” one of them asked. “I’m a huge fan! That
goal you scored against Barcelona last year…”
I shook my head, hoping Asher didn’t get mobbed once everyone figured
out who he was. But like he said, he was used to it. I had a feeling he could
take care of myself.
I, on the other hand, had a bigger issue to deal with.
Instead of approaching Josh, I exited the bar and lingered on corner of the
sidewalk outside. The Bronze Gear was getting more crowded, and I didn’t
want to hold a conversation in there.
As expected, Josh appeared less than a minute later.
“You’re not very subtle,” I said. Despite the thick summer heat,
goosebumps peppered my skin.
“I’m not here to be subtle, Red.” He stopped in front of me.
Warmth dripped from the air and into my veins. “What are you here for,
then?” I attempted to sound lighthearted despite the flutters in my chest. “Are
you stalking me, Josh Chen?”
“Are you trying to forget me, Jules Ambrose?”
I gulped at his dark tone.
“Because if you are…” Josh took another step toward me. “It’s not going
to work.”
The flutters went wild. “You have an awfully high opinion of yourself.”
A hard smile cut across his face. “I promised I’d give you all the time you
needed, and I will. But I’m not going to sit back while you date other guys,
Red.”
“I told you it wasn’t a date.”
“And I told you I don’t share. Not when it comes to you.” Josh’s eyes
burned into mine. “I don’t give a fuck if he’s a multimillionaire and plastered
on every magazine in the world. He could be the King of fucking England,

---

but he’ll never give you what I’m willing to give you.”
The goosebumps multiplied. “What’s that?”
“Everything.” He’d closed the distance between us until our mouths were
only centimeters apart. I stood my ground, but the electricity from earlier
returned in full force and buzzed through my veins. There were a handful of
other people on the sidewalk. They weren’t close enough to hear us, but it
didn’t matter anyway. The rest of the world didn’t exist when Josh was near
me. “My heart. My soul. My dignity. What do you want me to do, Jules?” His
voice splintered into something jagged and painful. “Do you want me to
fucking beg? Say the word, and I’ll be on my knees.”
Moisture gathered behind my eyes. I shook my head, my chest aching.
What are you so afraid of?
I didn’t deserve it.
I just had to get out of my own way.
Josh’s question from Bridget’s wedding echoed in my head. I didn’t have
the answer then, but I had it now.
I was afraid of me.
Even when I started falling for Josh, part of me knew we wouldn’t work
out as long as I was keeping a secret from him. But now that nothing stood in
our way, I was terrified—of being hurt, of not being enough, and of actually
being loved when I didn’t deserve it.
I wasn’t the little girl from Ohio anymore, but some things were so
ingrained from childhood that they became a part of us without us even
knowing. After a lifetime of being unwanted, I had no clue how to handle
someone who wasn’t willing to walk away.
Maybe it was time I learned.
“Promise me we’re real,” I whispered.
I could drag this out, make triple sure he wouldn’t break my heart again.
But I was so tired of resisting and sabotaging myself. After years of
swimming against the current, it was time to sink into something I wanted for
once, no matter where it took me.
And at the end of the day, no grand gesture matched that of making a
promise…and keeping it.
Josh cupped my face with his hands. “I promise.” A tiny smile tipped his
lips, and his eyes searched mine with cautious hope. “You’re stuck with me
forever, I’m afraid.”
His words sank into my skin and filled every inch of me with their

---

warmth.