Written by Malikov Asqarali Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere

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Written by Malikov Asqarali 
Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money 
could be better spent elsewhere.
It is commonly believed 
that
it will be
fair
when countries pay more attention to social issues, 
such as the improvement of
healthcare centers and educational institutions rather than arts. In 
my opinion, government should invest a lot of money in the most important things instead of arts.
governments should invest the funds of their budget spent on arts in other vital public facilities.
For certain reasons, some people consider that art is one of the most significant things in social 
life and also they think that art should be spent lots of fundings for its needs 
a great amount of 
funding should be allocated to the development of art
. In fact, learning art may have huge range 
of advantages in different ways. For example, 
it is possible
to express ideas and
share
concepts 
and by learning art, people can think 
and make decisions
quickly in most situations and
they
can 
be inspired, motivated to
live better life 
, because art can encourage creativity and promotes 
h
armony in society. For these reasons, government
s
should provide artists with variety of 
conveniences they need
by means of
financial aid. This is because that some artists 
may
not able 
to 
meet their own needs
without government funding. 
However, there are far more important issues
in a particular community
that need to be dealt 
with
, 
so that is why more money should be spent 
on those issues, namely
environmental 
problems, healthcare centres, schools and charities. Those that is mentioned above are 
considered as people's basic needs and they should be put before luxuries
, 
such as art. And 
another 
reason why it does not have to be invested lots of money on arts by governments is that 
there are enough wealthy patrons around to subsidize the arts. 
In conclusion, it is true that art plays
a
fundamental role in terms of 
improving individuals’ 
imaginative and creative skills
. I do feel, however, the advantages of art can not outweigh the 
other necessary 
matters
, such as environmental problems, education and medical services. 
This candidate has presented some ideas on both sides of the topic. Ideas are logically 
organized. Cohesive devices, including reference, are generally well managed ( for these reasons/ 
This is because/ In fact/ however). The range of vocabulary is wide enough to show some variety, 
some less common items and collocations (encourage creativity/ promotes harmony/ subsidize/ 
fundamental role). There is a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, some of which 
contain errors. 
This candidate may achieve a Band 6 or a Band 6.5 at best. 
Checked by Shahzod Abduraupov