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American Dialogues
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12. Workaholic
– OK, Jim. Tell me more about your work experience. – Oh I did this and that… I delivered pizza for a while… – And why did you quit the pizza delivery? – Oh, you know, my car broke down and stuff… – But do you have a reliable car now? You must have transportation to be hired. – Yes, I do and it runs great. It’s a vintage classic. I bought it from… – So, why do you want this job? – Well, I need to pay my rent, and you guys are hiring. I saw the ad in the paper. – Hmm… Your hair is pretty long. It’s against our policy. All our security officers have to have a neat, short haircut. And wear a uniform. – That’s tough, man! OK. I guess I can cut my hair… – All right then… One final question. What do you think your major personal flaw is? – I know the correct answer, man! I’m a… what’s the word? a workaholic! I work too hard! – Oh, I’m sure you do, buddy, I’m sure you do… 13. Cruising For A Bruising – You want coffee or tea? – I’m fine, thank you. – You’ve been sitting at the computer for two hours. I didn’t see you have breakfast. Or take a shower for that matter. – I’ve been chatting. I’ve found this new chat room and there’s this guy… – It’s not healthy, you know. You sit there staring at the screen and talking to yourself. You never even combed your hair. You look like a madman. – Oh, you exaggerate! I don’t look like a madman! It’s just that… – Go take a shower right now and have something to eat! – Oh really… – Do it now or you won’t know what hit you, buddy! You’re cruising for a bruising! – All right, I’ll go but I’ll be eating without an appetite! – Just shut up and go! Don’t try my patience any longer… 14. Harry Forever – Look at this line, Jane! It’s a half mile long! What’s going on? – Don’t you know? The one hundred fiftieth or so, book of Harry Potter by the famous author Rowling is out today. All her fans are standing in line to buy it. – No way! And, what about that fat, bald guy in his… fifties? He’s dressed up like a clown: night gown, moronic hat and all. What’s he supposed to be? – Your ignorance is appalling, my friend. He’s the Harry Potter, the young magician fighting the evil… – I know! I know! The… what’s his name… Potner fights the evil Agent Smith and the Matrix! – You savage! Don’t you know anything about the mass culture? The Matrix was fought by Neo, who was the Chosen One. And, there also was Morpheus and that chick in tight shiny pants you liked so much… – I remember! It’s come back to me now. We went to see it together, right? – Right. You were late for the show; and I was mad at you and didn’t talk to you for some time. – Yeah, I do remember. But, look at those guys; what a bunch of morons! – Yes, my friend, the brain-dead rule America... 15. Star light, star bright – What a gorgeous sunset! Just look at that view! It’s breathtaking! – Thank you. We like it too. – Like it? That’s what I call a serious understatement! I’m absolutely loving it! – Thank you. It’s always nice to hear. – Have you bought the house? – No, we could never have afforded it. Not these days. My parents left it to me. – Lucky you. It’s such a beautiful place. And so peaceful. – Yes, it is. And down there, we even have a private beach. – You’ve got a river? – No, it’s a lake. Look over there – we have a boat and a private mooring. – That beauty is your boat? I’m gonna die… By the way, what lake is it? – It’s Lake Sammamish. And, of course, it’s full of trout… Do you like fishing? – You bet. I come from Alaska. – We also have two horses, a pony, and a donkey. Can you ride a horse? – Yes, I can. – How about a ride tomorrow morning? – I’m so excited I can hardly wait! – Look, the first star! – Ah yes, “Star light, star bright…” – “I wish I may, I wish I might…” |
