Clients‟ experience of counselling within a narrative framework
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Beauty and the Beast ( PDFDrive )
6.3.1 Images
Images were the metaphors or similes that created a felt or visual image in my body or mind and 153 formed a picture of the participant‟s internal world, or feeling state at the time of writing. The power of words appears to be drawn out in the images that were created. This seems to display the importance of the way the participants were asked to write with just a few words on each line. Their feelings appear to be condensed and highlighted by this process. The images created in the journals were often powerful in that they appeared to image aspects of the participant‟s internal world. The following extract from a journal demonstrates a powerful image: Extract 20. From WAI journal W2 to illustrate a powerful image. Line 1. Felt good, valued, Line 2. embarrassed to be me. Line 3. Working on „stuckness‟. Line 4. Adult self - taking care of Line 5. child - pain, vulnerability Line 6. “frozen child” - pain + trauma. Line 7. Re-experiencing above - Line 8. need to find way of making it Line 9. OK, appropriate / liveable. Line 10. Recognition of loss in childhood Line 11. Co. feels good, real, not a book – human In the following extract from the analysis I look at what the image/metaphor of “frozen child” suggests about the participant‟s present condition: Extract 21. From the analysis to show the clients present condition. The client suggests that her adult self (line 4) takes care of her child (line 5) self and describes her child self as a „frozen child‟. This is a powerful image and surrounded by the words of pain, vulnerability and trauma suggesting the image of a child who is unable to move as well being 154 filled with emotive experiences. She is frozen, which is perhaps her present condition, cold as if she is unloved and possibly may struggle to feel the warmth of love. Part of her is perhaps still this frozen child. She appears to have re-experienced (line 7) some of her childhood feelings in the session and says that she needs to find a way of making the past okay, appropriate and liveable (lines 8,9). It feels as if the past was none of these things and perhaps the agony is that she cannot change the past and make it better. Such images in the journals help to tell the story of the participant during this recording of their counselling experience. This frozen child seems to thaw out during the process of counselling and find out more about who she is and what she feels as she appears to access and take possession of her own feelings. 6.3.2.Questions All the participants ask themselves questions in their journals and these seem to suggest what it is they want to do next. This is made clear when the outcome of a question is found. In week fifteen of her journal Wriggling fish writes: Extract 22. From WF to show the impact of questions. Line 1. Why was I angry as a child? Line 2. I found out! Line 3. Why do I need old patterns? Line 4. The time flew. Line 5. It feels safe and supported Line 6. I have freedom but no containment. Line 7. in my life. Line 8. I need to find a balance. Line 9. And not struggle so! 155 The question which asks why she was an angry child (line 1) appears to be answered immediately for she says she found out. She appears to feel that she has freedom but no containment (line 6), so perhaps as a child and as an adult she feels that there is something that she is unable to contain or own about herself. The real answer to the question seems to begin to show itself in the next entry, week sixteen (below), for Wriggling Fish begins to experience overwhelming (line 3) feelings, even speak feelings which appear to be new for her for she also says that she is learning (line 6) to do this: Extract 23. From WF to show a response to a question. Line 1. Gut wrenching tears!! Line 2. Two minutes yesterday Line 3. Overwhelming today. Line 4. I hated myself Line 5. Tissues, pillows Line 6. Learning to speak feelings Line 7. And feel it is OK!! Line 8. Safe, trust, supported. Line 9. A smile. Rather than only knowing where her feelings of anger come from, as in the previous entry, the participant seems to experience feeling. It seems that her anger has been hiding sadness which appears to be experienced during the session she writes about. Questions appear to move the participants forward as if enabling them to move internally. In this way the journals seemed to have enabled them to be reflexive about their counselling and themselves as if writing added awareness to their process. |
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