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Give and Take A Revolutionary Approach to Success ( PDFDrive )

Earth to America, 66
Eden, Dov, 97–98, 100
Edmondson, Amy, 85
Ego threat, and escalation of commitment, 113–14
Elders, The, 184
Elevation, and giving, 234–39
Elkind, Peter, 28–29
Empathy, 195–201
and altruism, 220–22
elements of, 195, 220, 222
empathy trap and givers, 195–201
versus generous tit for tat, 198–201
Encouragement, of potential in others, 102–8
Enders, John, 79, 82
Energy, gaining and giving, 175–77
Energy conservation, consumer motivations in, 236–38, 238n Energy network map, 52–53
Engineers
as givers, 7, 58–59
social network for, 42
Enron
demise, signs of, 35
Ken Lay as taker, 27–29, 32, 35–37
Erving, Julius, 109, 115, 117, 119
Escalation of commitment, 112–17
Escoto, Kildare, 137–140
Excite, 46–48
Expedition behavior, of givers, 74–75
Extreme Kindness, 266–67
Eye Care Associates, 137
F
Facebook, takers, recognizing on, 39–41
Fairness, and matchers, 5–6, 33, 43n Fake, Caterina, 31
Fallingwater, 68–69
Favors, expectations and takers, 44–45, 58
Feinberg, Matthew, 34
Feresten, Spike, 93
Ferrazzi, Keith, 44, 59–60
Fight or flight, 177
Financial advisers


as givers, 18–20
star analysis as collaborators, 71–72
First-person singular pronouns, use by takers, 36, 193
Fiske, Alan, 5–6n
Five-minute favor, 54–60, 264–65
Flynn, Frank, 58–59, 89, 218, 241
Forster, E. M., 248
Fowler, James, 56–57
Fraenkel, Fred, 71
Fragale, Alison, 144–45
Francis, Thomas, 79
Frank, Robert, 23, 204n
Franklin, Benjamin, 152–53
Freecycle
as common community, 224–28, 233–34
development of, 217–20
elevation and giving, 235, 238–39
free choice in, 248
optimal distinctiveness through, 233–34
as otherish, 223–24
taker and matcher giving, 222–24
Friedland, Roger, 68
Friedman, Ray, 206, 252
Friendster, 38
Frimer, Jeremy, 156
Frink, John, 86
Fritz, Heidi, 177
Furst, Stacie, 187
G
Galak, Jeff, 231
Galinsky, Adam, 197
Garbinsky, Emily, 183
Garcia, Ryan, 267
Gardner, Wendi, 179
Gasol, Paul, 123
Gates, Bill, 157
Geller, Jason
as balanced giver, 188–89
generous tit for tat by, 200
otherish approach by, 214
sincerity screening by, 194
Gender inequality, glass ceiling, 201–3, 203–4n Generous tit for tat, 198–201
Genesys Wealth Advisers, 20
Geniuses, versus genius makers, 63
George, Bill, 168
GetRaised, 265
Gift giving, and perspective gap, 89–90
Giftivism, 266
Gill, Brendan, 68, 69


Gino, Francesca, 89, 147–48
Giver profiles
Abraham Lincoln, 10–16, 199–200
Adam Rifkin, 41–43, 46–50, 53–56
Annie, 148-53
Bill Grumbles, 135–36
C. J. Skender, 96–97, 101–2, 105–8
Conrey Callahan, 160–62, 165–66, 168–71, 174–78
David Hornik, 1–9, 17, 23–25
Derek Sorenson, 250–54
Don Lane, 143–46
Freecycle/Deron Beal, 217–20, 224–28, 233–39, 248
George Meyer, 61–67, 73–78, 83–86, 88–93
Jason Geller, 188–89, 194, 200, 214
Jon Huntsman Sr., 35–37, 179–84
Kildare Escoto, 137–40
Lillian Bauer, 186–87, 194, 201, 208–9, 214–15
Peter Audet, 18–20, 189–91, 195–98
Richard Branson, 184–85
Sherryann, Plesse, 22, 255
Stu Inman, 108–11, 115–22, 124–25
Givers, 4–26
altruism, 220–24
asking for help, avoiding, 176–77, 268
assertiveness, lack of, 201–9
burnout myth, 165, 178–85
and collaboration, 66–67, 72–78
empathy trap, 195–201
in engineering, 7, 58–59
and escalation of commitment, 114–17
examples of. See Giver profiles expedition behavior of, 74–75
in financial adviser field, 18–20
genius makers as, 63
giver quotient, assessing, 261
interdependence versus independence, 73
in medical profession, 7, 17–18
motivation of, 156–58
negative traits of, 6–7, 10
negotiation by, 148–50, 195–215
and networking, 31, 41–58
online communities for giving, 265–68
own contribution, downplaying, 81–86
pathological giving. See Selfless giving perspective taking, 88–91, 92–93
in politics, 10–16
powerless communication, 130–54
productive habits of, 4–5, 8–10, 14–15, 22, 50–51, 53–56, 257–58
productivity problem of, 58–59, 155, 172–73, 186–87, 210–11
and pronoia, 48–50
psychological safety created by, 85–86
pushover effect, 189–215


reconnecting over time, 46–54
reluctance, reasons for, 22–23, 241–43, 254–55
responsibility bias, lack of, 83–86
salary, 203–4n
in sales, 137–42
and self-recognition, 254–58
in service sector, 17–20
and success, 6–10, 15–16, 156–58
success, view of, 257
takers becomin, 219–20, 245–49
takers disguised as, 27–28, 31–39
teachers as, 101–2, 106–7
trusting others, 189–94
in venture capital, 1–9, 17, 23–25
women versus men, 203–4n
in workplace, fears of, 22–23, 241–43, 254–55
Gladwell, Malcolm, 104, 191
Glass ceiling, 201–3, 203–4n
Glomb, Theresa, 75
Goethe, Johann Wolfgang von, 94
Go-Giver Community, 267
Goldner, Fred, 48
Gollwitzer, Peter, 245
Goodfellow, David, 267
GOOD thirty-day challenge, 267
Goodwill, and dormant ties, 51–53
Goodwin, Doris Kearns, 15
Google, job crafting, 262–63
Gopnik, Alison, 90
Gossip, as punishment, 34
Granger, Chris, 123n
Granovetter, Mark, 47
GraphScience, 53
Green Day, 46–48
Greene, Robert, 21
Grit, and talent development, 105–6
Groening, Matt, 63
Gross, Bob, 118–19
Groupon, 39–40
Groysberg, Boris, 71
Grumbles, Bill, 135–36
H
Hagerty, Sean, 173–75
Halbesleben, Jonathan, 177
Hambrick, Donald, 35–37
Handey, Jack, 72
Happiness, 170–75, 183–84
Hartman, Phil, 73
Havlicek, John, 121


Hawthorne, Christopher, 68
Heevner, Howard, 162
Helgeson, Vicki, 170, 177
HelpOthers.org, 266
Hill, Barton, 146–47
Hoffman, Reid, 31, 41n, 45, 49, 82
Hofmann, Dave, 147–48
Hollander, Edwin, 76
Holmes, John Andrew, 61
Homer, Mike, 192–93
HopeMob, 266
Hornik, David
blog of, 23–24
as giver, 1–9, 17, 23–25, 192
The Lobby conference, 24–25
Huckman, Robert, 70
Huntsman, Jon, Sr., 179–84
deal-making as giver, 180
humanitarian giving by, 181
image as giver, from annual report, 35–37
on wealth-giving connection, 181–82
Huntsman Cancer Center, 181
I
Identification. See also Empathy and common community, 224–28
giving, internalizing by takers, 245–49
name-similarity effect, 228–33
optimal distinctiveness theory, 233–34
Idiosyncrasy credits, and collaboration, 76
Independence
as cultural symbol, 73
versus interdependence, 73
and takers, 69–73, 81
working alone, 69–73
Influencing others
and communication of givers. See Powerless communication and takers, 130
traits related to, 130
Inman, Stu
and escalation of commitment, 114–17
talent in others, recognizing, 108–11
undervalued players, giving chance to, 118–25
Intelligence, investment theory of, 104
Intention questions, 142, 142n Investment theory of intelligence, 104
Isaacson, Walter, 153
J
Jacobson, Lenore, 98–99
Jecker, Jon, 152
Job crafting, 262–63
Job promotion, and givers, 186–89, 204–8


Johnson, Samuel, 32
Jones, James Earl, 129
Jones, Steve, 18
Jordan, Michael, 109, 115n, 122–24
Judge, Timothy, 203
K
Kahneman, Daniel, 33
Kahnweiler, Jennifer, 265
Kampen, Emerson, 180
Kanengieter, John, 75
Karma Kitchen, 266
Karsten, Anitra, 168
Kaufmann, Edgar, 68–69
Kawasaki, Guy, 45–46
Kersey, Jerome, 120, 124
Khare, Rohit, 40
Kickstarter, 268
Kim, Eugene, 75
Kindness Offensive, The, 267
King, Martin Luther, Jr., 27
“Kissing up, kicking down,” by takers, 32–33
Kiva, 231, 268
Klimecki, Olga, 165
Knowledge workers, working alone, 70
KnowNow, 40, 42
Kolditz, Tom, 106
Komisar, Randy, 10
Kopelman, Josh, 31
Korsgaard, Audrey, 114, 116
Krech, David, 242
Kurkoski, Jennifer, 263
L
Landy, David, 152
Lane, Don, 143–46
Lange, Paul van, 91n
Langer, Ellen, 169
Lay, Kenneth
and Bush family, 28, 29, 34, 44–45
disguise as giver, 27–28, 32, 38–39
favors, expected return from, 44–45
networking style, 29–30, 44–45
recognizing as taker, from annual report, 35–37
as taker, 27–29, 34, 44–45
Leadership development
talent in others, recognizing. See Talent development typical approach to, 103–4
Lee, Howard, 39–40
Legal profession, powerless communication example, 126–29, 134–35, 141–42, 146
Lekking
animals, 34–35


CEOs, recognizing in, 35–37
Lester, Scott, 116
Let’s Go, 209–12
Letterman, David, 62, 66
Levin, Daniel, 50
Lewis, Harry, 245
Lewis, L. James, 79
Liles, Kevin, 119–20
Liljenquist, Katie, 150–51
Lincoln, Abraham
elements of greatness, 14–15
generous tit for tat by, 199–200
as giver, 10–16
as selfless giver, 12–13
LinkedIn, 38
best networker (2011), 41–43
takers, recognizing via, 39–40
Listening, and powerless speech, 136–37, 139–40
Little, Brian, 48, 215
Lobby, The, 24–25
Logan, Stephen, 12–13
Long, Tim, 74–78, 83, 85, 93
Love, Kevin, 125
Love, Reggie
biographical information, 94–97
potential, recognized by others, 94, 96–97, 105
Love Machine, 264
Lovitz, Jon, 73
Lyubomirsky, Sonja, 171
M
McAdoo, Bob, 109, 115
McCall, Michael, 84
McCloskey, Jack, 117
MacKinnon, Donald, 64–65
McLean, Bethany, 28–29
McNatt, Brian, 100–103
Mandela, Nelson, 184
Mann, John David, 267
Marriage and dating
choosing wedding gifts, 89–90
couples negotiating, 196
responsibility bias, 81–82
selfless giving problem, 170n Martin, LaRue, 108–11, 115, 117, 122, 125
Maslach, Christina, 161, 177
Matchers
advice seeking from, 153
attributes related to, 5–6, 33, 43n and burnout, 178–79
and collaboration, 76, 78–79
and Craigslist, 216–20


dormant ties, reactivating, 52
generous tit for tat, 198–201
givers disguised as, 22–23
giving and motivations of, 43–45, 223, 228, 237–38, 244, 258
giving style of, 258–59
negotiation by, 149
and networking, 43–44, 45
and self-fulfilling prophecy, 101
success, view of, 256–57
takers punished by, 33–34
and tit for tat, 198
trading value by, 55
traits related to, 5–6, 33, 43n Matteson, Joel, 11–12
Medical profession
burnout predictors, 178–79
givers in, 7, 17–18
hospital affiliation and performance, 70
patient contact, importance of, 167–68
perspective gap in, 87–88
Medtronic, 168
Meglino, Bruce, 114, 116
Mehta, Nipun, 266
Meyer, George, 61–67
biographical information, 61–63, 65–66, 72
code of honor of, 75
as collaborator, 66–67, 72–78, 83–86, 88–93
creativity of, 65
and crediting others, 77–78, 83–84, 93
expedition behavior of, 74–75
as giver, 65–67, 73–78, 83–86, 93
own contribution, downplaying, 83–85
and perspective taking, 88–91, 90–91n, 92–93
Michaels, Lorne, 62
Miller, Dale, 23
Minds Matter Philadelphia, 161–62, 165–66, 171, 174–75
Misner, Ivan, 60, 267
Modesty, and powerless communication, 130–54
Moltz, David, 108
Monk, 62
Moon, Henry, 114
Morris, Michael, 205–6
Moskovitz, Dustin, 31
Motivation, 156–78
cause, need for givers, 163–66
chunking versus sprinkling and satisfaction, 170–75
energy gains and giving, 175–77
hundred hour happiness, 173–74
impact vacuum, filling by givers, 162–69
otherish choices, 157–58, 169–79
self-interest versus other-interest, 156–58


takers, 162–63
Murnighan, Keith, 50
Murphy, Terry, 111, 122
Myspace, 38
N
Name-similarity effect, 228–33, 231n Neal, Lloyd, 115
Negotiation
advice seeking during, 150–53
empathy trap in, 196–97
and givers, 148–50, 205–9
and matchers, 149
otherish approach to, 205–9, 211–15
and powerless speech, 148–54
shifting from taking toward giving, 250–54
and takers, 149
Nelson, Leif, 234–35
Networking, 34–60
benefits from, 30, 46–50
contagion of giving, 56–58
dormant ties, 50–54
energy network map, 52–53
giver networks, operation of, 46–50, 52–56
and givers, 31, 41–58
karmic moments, 46–50
and matchers, 43–44, 45
online. See Social networks Reciprocity Ring, 239–45
reconnecting over time, 46–54
and takers, 29–30, 43–46, 56
takers, recognizing, 34–38
Newmark, Craig, 216–17

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