The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are

Scarcity and Fear of the Dark
The very first time I tried to write about what gets in the way of gratitude and joy, I was in sitting on
the couch in my living room with my laptop next to me and my research memo journal in my hands. I
was tired and rather than writing, I spent an hour staring at the twinkle lights hanging over the
entryway into my dining room. I’m a huge fan of those little clear, sparkly lights. I think they make
the world look prettier, so I keep them in my house year-round.
As I sat there flipping through the stories and gazing at the twinkle lights, I took out a pen and
wrote this down:
Twinkle lights are the perfect metaphor for joy. Joy is not a constant. It comes to us in moments—often ordinary moments. Sometimes we miss out on the bursts of joy because we’re too busy chasing down extraordinary moments. Other times
we’re so afraid of the dark that we don’t dare let ourselves enjoy the light.
A joyful life is not a floodlight of joy. That would eventually become unbearable.
I believe a joyful life is made up of joyful moments gracefully strung together by trust, gratitude, inspiration, and faith.
For those of you who follow my blog, you’ll recognize this as the mantra for my gratitude posts
on Fridays that I call TGIF. I turned this quote into a small badge, and part of my gratitude practice is
a weekly post about what I’m Trusting, what I’m Grateful for, what Inspires me, and how I’m
practicing my Faith. It’s incredibly powerful to read everyone’s comments.
Joy and gratitude can be very vulnerable and intense experiences. We are an anxious people and
many of us have very little tolerance for vulnerability. Our anxiety and fear can manifest as scarcity.
We think to ourselves:
I’m not going to allow myself to feel this joy because I know it won’t last.
Acknowledging how grateful I am is an invitation for disaster.
I’d rather not be joyful than have to wait for the other shoe to drop.