The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are

and photography when the real work of achieving and accomplishing needs to be done?
By the time I was forty and working on this research, my lack of interest in creativity had turned
into disdain. I’m not sure if I would categorize my feelings about creativity as negative stereotypes,
shame triggers, or some combination of the two, but it came to the point where I thought of creating
for the sake of creating as self-indulgent at best and flaky at worst.
Of course I know, professionally, that the more entrenched and reactive we are about an issue, the
more we need to investigate our responses. As I look back with new eyes, I think tapping into how
much I missed that part of my life would have been too confusing or painful.
I never thought I’d come across something fierce enough to shake me loose from my entrenched
beliefs about creativity. Then this research came along …
Let me sum up what I’ve learned about creativity from the world of Wholehearted living and
loving:
1. “I’m not very creative” doesn’t work. There’s no such thing as creative people and non-creative
people. There are only people who use their creativity and people who don’t. Unused creativity
doesn’t just disappear. It lives within us until it’s expressed, neglected to death, or suffocated by
resentment and fear.
2. The only unique contribution that we will ever make in this world will be born of our creativity.
3. If we want to make meaning, we need to make art. Cook, write, draw, doodle, paint, scrapbook,
take pictures, collage, knit, rebuild an engine, sculpt, dance, decorate, act, sing—it doesn’t
matter. As long as we’re creating, we’re cultivating meaning.
Literally one month after I worked through the data on creativity, I signed up for a gourd-painting
class. I’m not even kidding. I went with my mom and Ellen, and it was one of the best days of my life.
For the first time in decades, I started creating. And I haven’t stopped. I even took up photography.

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It might sound cliché, but the world doesn’t even look the same to me anymore. I see beauty and
potential everywhere—in my front yard, at a junk store, in an old magazine—everywhere.
It’s been a very emotional transition for me and for my family. Both of my kids love art, and we do
family projects together all the time. Steve and I are Mac addicts, and we love to make movies
together. Last month, Ellen told us that she either wants to be a chef or a “life artist” like my friend Ali
Edwards, who inspires both of us. At this point, Charlie loves to paint and would like to own a booger
store (which is both creative and entrepreneurial).
I also realized that much of what I do in my work is creative work. Writer William Plomer
described creativity as “the power to connect the seemingly unconnected.” My work is all about
making connections, so part of my transformation was owning and celebrating my existing creativity.
Letting go of comparison is not a to-do list item. For most of us, it’s something that requires
constant awareness. It’s so easy to take our eyes off our path to check out what others are doing and if
they’re ahead or behind us. Creativity, which is the expression of our originality, helps us stay
mindful that what we bring to the world is completely original and cannot be compared. And, without
comparison, concepts like ahead or behind or best or worst lose their meaning.