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T H E N U T S A N D B O L T S O F P R A G M A T I C S I N S T R U C T I O N
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Examples 2–8 are actual stories as written by anonymous teacher participants in
the 2006–8 CARLA summer institute on teaching pragmatics at the University of
Minnesota. Slight edits are in brackets.
on picking up the bill as they were slightly older in age. At the end of the dinner she
said, “I wish we could have invited you over to our humble home, but we have
always been very busy.”
Sample discussion questions
■
Why do Chinese (and some other East Asian language speakers) sometimes
refuse some formal invitations a few times before finally accepting it? What
values and cultural assumptions underlie that pragmatic convention?
■
If you were in the story and noticed that something might be inappropriate in
what you said, how could you find out what it might have been?
■
Whose speech norms are likely to be used in multicultural situations like this,
Chinese/Japanese, English, mixed, or? How might that change over time and
across situations?
Example 2
10
When I was studying Spanish in Mexico, I took a course in figurative speech and
idiomatic expressions. One phrase I learned was to say ni madres to emphasize
negation. Later, when I was in an office at a university, a friend of mine asked me
about the course, and for an example of an expression I said “No entiendo ni
madres,” Everyone in the room looked shocked, then began to laugh hilariously.
This expression would have been appropriate for Mexican teenagers to use with
each other, but shouldn’t have been used in mixed company.
Example 3
Because I have an outgoing personality and Japanese people tend to be polite and
forgiving of foreigners, I think it is especially difficult to learn pragmatics when 
living in Japan, except by observation. I did have a friend, who I called gyogi keisatsu
or “manners police” who took it upon herself to correct my behavior. I was grateful
for her help but often got overwhelmed by the quantity of behavioral norms and
resisted changing at some points.
Example 4
Since I originally learned Spanish in Mexico, I do not use the vosotros form, even
when I travel to Spain. I also have a hard time saying vale and instead say sale when

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I’m there for “OK” which is what I’d say in Mexico. Vale just feels weird, and kind
of snobbish. Spaniards looked at me funny when I’d say sale instead of vale.
Somehow I guess I was retaining my “Mexican identity,” Now people tell me I have
a Spanish accent.
Example 5
After being in the military for a number of years, I was at a family dinner and said,
“Pass the f---ing potatoes,” creating a deep shock with the family.
Example 6
Even in English (my native language), I have difficulty. The first time I went to a
funeral (I was 48), I had no idea what to say to the widow in English!!
Example 7
[Experience in learning Spanish, translated into English] My sister and I were
invited to dinner at the home of Mrs Wilson, the secretary at the Department of
Modern Languages. She was my supervisor when I was a student assistant. She
served us a wonderful dinner, and at the end of dinner, my sister thanked her 
by saying, “Mrs Wilson, I thank you for the invitation. The dinner was so terrible,”
to which Mrs Wilson was startled and exclaimed: “Terrible? Well, you must mean 
something else!” I elbowed my sister and whispered in her ear and she added: “No,
terrific!”
Example 8
We have a great recording in our archives by a French exchange student at XXX
University who was completely frustrated and hurt by the “ostensible invitations”
[rhetorical invitations] of other American students. “You’ve got to check this place
out! We’ll have to go some time on a Friday night!” And he was disappointed and
offended when the plans he thought had been made weren’t.
[However,] this doesn’t just happen to “foreigners.” [ There are] 3
rd
culture
kids, growing up abroad so that our native instinct is no longer completely trust-
worthy . . . I worked in a bookstore in Chicago for a year . . . So did another girl,
whom I liked but didn’t know well. We bumped into each other in the train. I was
pleased to see her again and I believe she said something like, “We’ll have to get
together for lunch.” I was delighted and pulled out my agenda. She looked shocked
and offered some excuses. Not until years later did I understand better what 
happened.

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