tend to argue with their classmates and argumentativeness
becomes a pattern in their lives.
These arguments also mean that the child has no example to
follow, because he loses trust and respect for his arguing parents.
This leads to the child failing in life because he has no example to
follow. Continuation of these arguments
may lead the child to
hate one or both of his parents and feel put off by the entire
family.
Now the parents have to ask themselves: could this atmosphere
produce children who are successful and psychologically stable?
On this topic Dr. Fifaan Ahmad Fu’ad, Professor of Psychiatry at
Helwan
University, says: “A tense relationship between the
spouses has a negative and destructive effect on the character of
the child. It makes him develop fear of society and a sense of
insecurity. It weakens his character
in school and affects his
ability to learn and focus. The child who grows up in a family
where marital disputes are intense stays in his room or in some
corner of the house, fearfully watching
a soap opera in which the
stars are his mother and father, who are his primary examples in
life. The child develops fear and feels insecure as a result of the
rise of adrenaline in his body. The activity
of the vagus nerve in
the stomach limits the amount of blood reaching the brain. All of
these are symptoms that lead a lack of alertness and focus, which
in turn leads to falling grades in children.
The solution to all of that is as follows:
• Not having arguments with one’s
spouse in front of the
children.
• If one of the spouses feels that a discussion is developing
into an argument, he or she can retreat by leaving quietly
and
going to the balcony, for example, to get some fresh
air, or sitting down in a comfy chair in a dimly lit room
until he or she calms down and things go back to normal.
• Trying to reach a balanced solution
to marital disputes by
means of communication and patience. The parents
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