The 50th Law (with 50 Cent)

The Hostile Attitude. Some children exhibit a hostile attitude at
a very early age. They interpret weaning and the natural separation
from parents as hostile actions. Other children must deal with a parent
who likes to punish and inflict hurt. In both cases, the child looks out
on a world that seems fraught with hostility, and their answer is to seek
to control it by becoming the source of the hostility themselves. At least
then it is no longer so random and sudden. As they get older, they
become adept at stimulating anger and frustration in others, which
justifies their original attitude—“See, people are against me, I am
disliked, and for no apparent reason.”
In a relationship, a husband with a hostile attitude will accuse his
wife of not really loving him. If she protests and becomes defensive, he
will see this as a sign that she has to try hard to disguise the truth. If
she is intimidated into silence, he sees that as a sign that he was right
all along. In her confusion, she can easily begin to feel some hostility
on her part, confirming his opinion. People with this attitude have

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many other subtle tricks up their sleeve for provoking the hostility they
secretly want to feel directed at them—withdrawing their cooperation
on a project at just the wrong moment, constantly being late, doing a
poor job, deliberately making an unfavorable first impression. But they
never see themselves as playing any kind of role in instigating the
reaction.
Their hostility permeates everything they do—the way they argue
and provoke (they are always right); the nasty undertone of their jokes;
the greediness with which they demand attention; the pleasure they
get out of criticizing others and seeing them fail. You can recognize
them by how they are easily moved to anger in these situations. Their
life, as they describe it, is full of battles, betrayals, persecutions, but
seemingly not originating from them. In essence, they are projecting
their own hostile feelings onto other people and are primed to read
them in almost any apparently innocent action. Their goal in life is to
feel persecuted and to desire some form of revenge. Such types
generally have career problems, as their anger and hostility frequently
flare up. This gives them something else to complain about and a basis
on which to blame the world for being against them.
If you notice signs of this attitude in yourself, such self-awareness is
a major step toward being able to get rid of it. You can also try a simple
experiment: Approach people you are meeting for the first time, or
only know peripherally, with various positive thoughts—“I like them,”
“They seem smart,” et cetera. None of this is verbalized, but you do
your best to feel such emotions. If they respond with something hostile
or defensive, then perhaps the world is truly against you. More than
likely you will not see anything that could be remotely construed as
negative. In fact, you will see the opposite. Clearly, then, the source of
any hostile response is you.
In dealing with the extremes of this type, struggle as best you can to
not respond with the antagonism they expect. Maintain your
neutrality. This will confound them and temporarily put a stop to the
game they are playing. They feed off your hostility, so do not give them
fuel.