The Art Of Saying no: How To Stand Your Ground, Reclaim Your Time And Energy, And Refuse To Be Taken For Granted


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The art of saying no

WE FEAR MISSING OUT ON
OPPORTUNITIES
H
ave you ever said yes to your boss because you were
afraid that saying no would disqualify you for a raise,
promotion, or new responsibilities? Have you ever said yes
to a friend because you feared saying no would cost you a
rewarding life experience?
That’s the fear of missing out (FOMO for short). It’s the
anxiety we feel at the prospect of being unable to take
advantage of opportunities. And it’s a common reason many
of us say yes even when we realize saying no would be a
better decision.
For example, at the workplace, we take on new projects
because we fear that declining them will impede the
advancement of our careers.
With our friends, we commit ourselves to activities
because we’re afraid to miss out on rewarding experiences.
Social media only reinforces this tendency. We’re
constantly reading Facebook on our phones and tablets,
watching others post about their experiences, and chiding
ourselves for not having our own to post. We end up saying
yes to things just so we don’t feel left out.
The curious result is that we start to feel unfocused,
frustrated, and unhappy, even as we strive to take
advantage of every opportunity. Why? Because we


inevitably stretch ourselves too thin pursuing things that are
inconsequential to us.
So the problem isn’t that we say yes to opportunities.
The problem is that we fail to discriminate between the
wrong opportunities and the right ones.
Remember, there’s only so much time in the day. You
can’t do everything. That means each time you say yes to
something, you tacitly say no to something else.
In pursuing some opportunities, you miss out on others.
This is one of the reasons it’s important to learn to say
no. By declining some offers, you allow yourself the freedom
to say yes to those that’ll prove truly rewarding to you.
This change in habit requires a change in mindset. It
entails abandoning your fear of missing out while remaining
aware of opportunities that are consistent with your goals
and interests.



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