Action
Tears, fears, and the occasional tug-of-war are all par for the course
when living with toddlers. But that doesn’t mean you’re powerless to
make things better.
On the contrary, this last chapter will help you use
the whole doctor’s bag of
Happiest Toddler tools and skills to solve almost
any challenge your young child will throw at you. (Note:
For a quick
review, read a description of each
Happiest Toddler skill in the “Key
Terms and All-Star Tricks” section on
Appendix B
.)
Most of the problem behaviors parents have
to deal with during these
years fall into one of four main groups:
1. Worries and fears. Examples: separation worries, fears,
abandonment issues when a new baby arrives.
2. Annoying attitudes and actions. Examples: dawdling,
interrupting, whining.
3. Defiance. Examples: refusing medicine, fighting the car seat,
picky eating.
4. Aggressive and/or dangerous behavior. Examples: attacks on
other children (hitting, pinching, biting), running away.
Behavior Challenge #1: Worries
and Fears
Some tykes meet new people and situations with bouncy confidence.
They jump right in and away they go.
But for other little kids, worries
lurk around every corner. These easily rattled children often:
• have a shy,
slow-to-warm-up temperament
• are stressed (hungry, tired, bored, sick, facing big challenges,
etc.)
• had a really scary experience in the past
What can you do to help these kids overcome their fears? In a word:
lots! Let’s look at a few examples….
Worried-Behavior Example:
Separation Worries
When your little one begs you not to
abandon her at preschool (or at the
babysitter’s or at bedtime), it can be tough to handle.
Sad eyes and
clingy pleas really pull at the heart-strings!
Here’s how Mari uses the Fast-Food Rule and Toddler-ese to handle
her son’s separation worries:
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