The Happiest Baby on the Block and The Happiest Toddler on the Block 2-Book Bundle pdfdrive com

Jack, age three, hated shoes and socks but loved sandals.
That was okay with his mom, Shaya, on most days, but
this day it was raining badly. After his mom’s Toddler-ese
failed to persuade him to put on shoes, Shaya offered a
“crummy” 50-50 compromise: “Wear the shoes now, and
you can have the sandals after school.” Jack flat-out
refused: “No way!”
Then Shaya sat on the floor and pretended Jack was
just too tough a bargainer for her. “Okay! You win! You
win! You always win!” Then she offered another deal:
Jack could either wear one shoe and one sandal now and
put the other shoe on at school, or he could wear sandals
to the car and put shoes on when the car arrived at the
school. He accepted the latter and Shaya made a little pen
check on his hand for being so helpful.
I find 90-10 compromises are a big help when I’m examining unhappy
toddlers. For example, I start by “losing” several times in a row. With the
child on his mom’s lap and me kneeling just below eye level (to be a
little less threatening), I beg for something he has: Putting my hand out,
I plead, “Please, can I have your shoe? P-l-e-a-s-e?”
When he refuses, I continue playing the boob by sounding even more
pitiful. “Okay, but can I have your teddy? Please? Pleeeease?” When he
refuses again I say, “Okay! You win. You always win me. But what about
your shirt? I really, really need it! Can I have your shirt? Pleeeeease?”
I usually ask for several things in succession, sulking and pouting with
each rejection (“You win, you always win!”). By then, even the most
reluctant child feels like a winner: safe, strong, and triumphant! (And
besides, they think it’s kind of funny.)
Next, I ignore the child for a minute while I talk to the parent. By this
time, the child knows he’s “beaten me” so many times that it’s only fair
to let me win a tiny bit! After a few minutes, I turn back to the child and
ask for something very simple: “Can I listen to your shoe?” Most kids

---

don’t resist this. Then, I immediately reward the cooperation by letting
him hold one of my little toys.