Middle toddlers: Sameness and predictability help two-year-olds
feel safe. For middle toddlers, unexpected disruptions in routine can
trigger anxiety. For example, a child who’s fine every day when
Daddy drops her off may cry and cling the day Dad is unavailable
and Mom has to take her to day care.
Older toddlers: Your three-year-old’s growing skill with words
will tend to lessen her anxiety. But you’re not out of the woods yet!
A scary cartoon or experience can suddenly shift her imagination
into high alert and push her over the line into panic.
Worried-Behavior Example: Sudden New Fears
Fear is a common problem for toddlers and often comes on without
warning. Typical fears include monsters, snakes, spiders, attackers, the
dark, and being abandoned, but your tot could develop a fear of almost
anything—including clowns! (As a young child I was afraid of a closet in
our laundry room where my parents kept a recording of Sleeping
Beauty…. It had a scary witch’s voice on it.)
Stella, three, was smart and confident. So the day she
spied an ant crawling up her leg, her hysterical crying
came from out of the blue. Her mom, Fran, removed the
tiny bug, reassured her daughter, and then they both
promptly forgot the whole incident … or so it seemed.
The next day, however, Stella complained that she was
afraid to sit in the grass because of the “buggies.” Fran
afraid to sit in the grass because of the “buggies.” Fran
persuaded her to play outside by tucking her pants into
her socks to “protect her.” But that night things got worse.
Once in bed, Stella cried out: “Go! Go! Mommy! M-O-M-
M-Y!!!” Fran arrived seconds later and little Stella clung
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