To help her three-year-old, Myles, get over his fear of
dogs, Maria would play “Puppy Pretend” with her little
guy: “Honey, do you want to be the big dog with sharp
teeth and scare me? Or do you want me to be the dog and
you can be brave?” And at night she would put his cuddly
dog doll right next to him in bed to keep the bad dogs
away.
Magic Breathing.
Calm breathing helps children learn how to keep
panic under control. If you have an older toddler, I recommend you
practice it every day … especially if she is anxious or fearful.
For example, if your child is upset about a dog, first connect with
respect (“You say, ‘No, no, doggie … no!’ Say, ‘You go away, doggie! Go
away!’ Wow, that doggie was a little scary, huh?”). Then, once she
calms, do some magic breathing. This will help her complete her
calming and feel some mastery over the fear.
Confidence Builders.
Making your child feel big and strong can
also help her overcome fears. Practice boosting her overall confidence
(listen with respect, ask her opinion, play the boob) once or twice an
hour. And take some specific steps to build her confidence about the
thing she fears. For example, if she’s petrified by bugs, read books about
bugs, cut bug pictures out of magazines to make a scrapbook, etc.
Fran found a library book to read to Stella showing that
bugs lived in the dirt (not in kids’ beds) and that they ate
leaves (“They think kids taste yucky! Phooey!”). The
pictures showed how tiny a bug is and how big a kid is.
And Stella loved for her mom to draw a picture of a bug
on a piece of paper and then she would crumple it up and
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