The Mountain Is You

HOW TO RESOLVE THIS 
Healthy emotional processing looks different for everyone 
but generally involves these steps: 
• 
Get clear on what happened.

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BRIANNA WIEST
• 
Validate your feelings.
• 
Determine a course correction.
First, you need to understand why you’re upset or the rea-
son why something is bothering you so much. Without 
clarity on this, you’ll continue to waste your time mulling 
over the details without really understanding what’s hurt-
ing you so much.
Next, you have to validate how you feel. Recognize that 
you are not alone; anyone in your situation would prob-
ably feel similarly (and does) and that what you feel is 
absolutely okay. In doing this, you can allow yourself a 
physical release such as crying, shaking, journaling about 
what you feel, or talking to a trusted friend.
Once you are clear on what’s wrong and have allowed 
yourself to fully express the extent of your emotions, you 
can determine how you will change your behavior or 
thought process so that you get an outcome that you really 
want in the future.
J U S T I F I C AT I O N 
Your life is ultimately measured by your outcomes, not 
your intentions. It is not about what you wanted to do or 
would have done but didn’t have the time. It’s not about 
why you thought you couldn’t; it’s just whether or not you 

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BRIANNA WIEST
eventually did. When you’re in a pattern of self-sabotag-
ing behavior, you’re often treating those excuses the same 
way you would treat measurable outcomes: You’re using 
them to make yourself feel momentarily satisfied, using 
them as a replacement for the accomplishment itself. 
When we have a goal, dream, or plan, there is no measure 
of intent. It is only whether you did it or did not. Any 
other reason you offer for not showing up and doing the 
work is simply you stating that you prioritize that reason 
over your ultimate ambition, which means that it will al-
ways take precedence in your life. 
You may also be using excuses to help navigate away from 
uncomfortable feelings that are ultimately necessary for 
your growth.