B a r b a r a s h e r I l L u s t r a t I o n s b y r a L p h

L
E A R N E D
This activity is especially good for teens who avoid writing. Because the
subject matter is so dear to their hearts, they are more likely to feel inspired
to write and, if the variation is used, draw. Personal stories often encourage
prolonged attention because the subject is so interesting!
I’m Like That Sometimes
We’re told as children that sticks and stones can break our bones but names
will never hurt us. But it’s not true. Our bones can heal and never bother
us again, but a disparaging remark can hurt for a lifetime.
If parents in a frustrating moment hurl a negative character label at
their child (for example, telling him he is “mean”), that child, in his
Games for Teens
153
10_736546 ch05.qxp 5/26/06 12:01 PM Page 153

---

impressionable and vulnerable state, can take in that label and deeply
believe it. After all, he has had mean thoughts. He may think that the
omniscient grown-up knows his secret true self.
It’s so uncomfortable to feel bad about oneself that a common way to
deal with these kinds of appraisals is to deny them totally. I am not mean!!
The reality is that we all have mean thoughts or say hurtful things
sometimes.
In this game, you can help your adolescent cut himself a little slack and
see that we are all a mix of all human emotions.
M
A T E R I A L S
None
D
I R E C T I O N S
Teach your teen to use the phrase “I’m like that sometimes” if he commits
a thoughtless act. Using that expression (or something similar, such as
“Sometimes we humans do thoughtless things”) makes the act bearable.
The attitude is not condemning because the teen is noticing the nature of
being human: sometimes we do thoughtless things. By noticing our
thoughtless acts we are less likely to commit them again.