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unsupportive and hurtful to the male ego. A woman may try to be sensitive to a man's feelings,
but because his primary love needs are different from hers, she doesn't instinctively anticipate
his needs.
Through understanding a man's primary love needs, a woman can be more aware and sensitive
to the sources of his discontent. The following is a list of common communication mistakes
women make in relation to a man's primary love needs.
Mistakes Woman Commonly Make When He Doesn’t Feel Loved
1. She tries to improve
his behavior or help him
by offering unsolicited advice.
1. He feels unloved because she doesn't
trust him
anymore.
2. She tries to change or control his behavior by
sharing her upset or negative feelings. (It is OK to
share feelings but
not when they attempt to
manipulate or punish.)
2. He feels unloved because she doesn't
accept
him as he is.
3. She doesn't acknowledge what he does for her
but complains about what he has not done.
3. He feels taken
for granted and unloved
because she doesn't
appreciate what he does.
4. She corrects his behavior and tells him what to
do, as if he were a child.
4. He feels unloved because he does not feel
admired.
5. She expresses her upset feelings indirectly with
rhetorical questions like "How could you do
that?"
5. He feels unloved
because he feels she has
taken away her
approval of him.
He no longer
feels like the good guy.
6. When he makes decisions or takes initiatives
she corrects or criticizes him.
6. He feels unloved because she does not
encourage him to do things on his own.
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