The Happiest Baby on the Block and The Happiest Toddler on the Block 2-Book Bundle pdfdrive com

The Famous Parental “But”
“I know you want to leave, but …” Parents commonly use the word
“but” to mark the end of their upset child’s turn and begin their
own. If your tot resists leaving the park, try first repeating her
feelings for ten seconds or so: “You say, ‘No leave! No leave!’ You
love the park.” Then, as she starts to calm, switch to your turn: “…
but, we have to go. Let’s hurry! Then we can play with Daddy at
home!”
First you respect your child’s feelings; then you use your
enthusiasm to sweep her along to the next activity.

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Emotions Are Great: They Make Us
Healthy!
Did you know that emotions make us healthy? In fact, the way in which
you react to your child’s expression of emotion will contribute greatly to
his health—and happiness—for the rest of his life. That’s why the Fast-
Food Rule is so important.
However, there’s a huge and important difference between emotions
and actions. While many actions are unacceptable, most feelings are
legitimate and should be promptly acknowledged (with the FFR).
Of course, you will often have to stop your toddler’s unacceptable
actions (fighting, rude words, etc.). But when his strong feelings (anger,
fear, frustration, etc.) are ignored or squelched, they don’t just disappear.
They continue to simmer under the surface—sometimes for an entire
lifetime.
Bottled-up feelings can lead to a profound sense of loneliness (“No one
understands”/“No one cares”) or even bursts of hysteria (think drama
queen or someone needing anger-management classes). Kids whose
words of fear and frustration are repeatedly silenced may grow up
emotionally disconnected (like the guy who snarls “I’m NOT angry!”,
totally unaware that the veins are popping out of his forehead).
And that’s not all. Unexpressed emotion can also contribute to
headaches, colitis, depression … perhaps even arthritis and cancer!
On the other hand, when we “have a good cry” we feel and think
better. Venting anger with a good scream or punching a pillow can
lower our blood pressure and help us recover, forgive, and move on.
Laughter and tears have even been shown to strengthen the immune
system and help heal illness.
Children whose feelings are lovingly acknowledged during the toddler
years grow up emotionally intact. They know how to ask their friends
for help and how to support others in need. They seek out healthy
relationships, avoiding bullies and choosing confidantes and life partners

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who are thoughtful and kind.
Respect: As Important as Love
The magic of the Fast-Food Rule is that it conveys your sincere respect.
Respect is not some modern, “airy-fairy,” politically correct concept. It is
essential to good relationships. (Of course, love is important too, but
disrespect can make even loving relationships crumble.) And to get
respect … you must give respect. That is why one of the first things all
ambassadors are taught in their training is how to listen and speak with
respect.
Respect does not mean letting your toddler run wild. You will often
have to enforce your parental authority. But when you are both firm and
respectful, you will be modeling to your child exactly the behavior you
want to nurture in her.
Don’t worry if it takes you a little time to get the hang of this new way
of communicating. Even if you only do the FFR once a day … that’s a
great start. And, like riding a bicycle, the more you practice it, the more
comfortable you’ll get. I guarantee that soon you’ll feel like you’ve been
using the FFR your entire life.