Microsoft Word Marriage Guide doc

Source: 
www.al-islamforall@org
 
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disease, erection cannot occur. Nearly all men experience this at some time or other, 
and it is recognised as a particular problem in stressful modern societies. It may be that 
a man is too tired, or anxious, or his mind is full of something, or he may simply be ill. It 
is the duty of a Muslim wife to be very patient, and not act in a way that would upset 
the husband or make him feel like a failure, since that would make the problem for 
worse. Wives should not stress their husbands by making demands of them at these 
times, but should show that they still appreciate and respect them, perhaps by some 
tenderness that does not lead to full intercourse. In most cases, the husband will soon 
pick up again. A good Muslim wife has the duty to ensure that her husband's diet is 
adequate and that he is generally in good health. She will also encourage him to take 
regular exercise. For some Islamic herbal remedies see Chishti, The Traditional Healer, 
276-8. 
Husbands with recurrent difficulties of this sort should pluck up the courage to see a 
doctor, as the cause is often a disease of the arteries, and there are new 'conventional' 
treatments available such as Prostaglandin E1 which are frequently very effective. 
I
.U.D.
(Inter-uterine device, or `coil'). This is a plastic loop inserted into the uterus 
by a doctor, and left in place for long periods of time. It can sometimes be expelled or be 
painful, and it needs renewing every two years. Not usually recommended until after 
bearing the first child, and not recommended in Islam because it allows conception to take 
place but then prevents the embryo from embedding itself in the wall of the uterus. 
Janaba.
The state between sexual emission or penetration, and ghusl. It is 
permissible to sleep, eat, and do most things in this condition, but not to touch the Qur'an, 
or to mention sacred words and phrases more than is absolutely necessary. 
Kissing.
A few cultures do not seem to include kissing in their sexual repertoire, but 
most people find it a vital part of lovemaking, especially in the preliminary stages. The 
Blessed Prophet once rebuked a man who claimed he had never kissed his children; and the 
case of a man who never kisses his wife will presumably be similar! There are many 
different kinds of kissing, and they all require a clean mouth and teeth, and fresh breath 
(remember your Miswak!). Muslims should not inflict kisses on their spouses which are 
distasteful to them, and both should realise that there are skills to be learned. The kind of 
behaviour seen in films may be distasteful to them, and sexual kissing and petting (as 
opposed to the kiss of the relative as part of a greeting) should not be done in public.