Personal Development for Smart People: The Conscious Pursuit of Personal Growth
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Personal Development for Smart People
Habits and Courage
Use a variation of the heart-centered question to evaluate your habits. W h i c h habits put y o u on the path with a heart? W h i c h ones lead y o u astray? D o n ' t wait for g o o d habits to install themselves or for bad habits to die on their o w n . You must take the initiative and 157 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT FOR SMART PEOPLE create the changes y o u desire. Cultivate behaviors that keep y o u on the heart-centered path, and drop habits that don't have a heart. To build your courage, make a habit of doing something that scares y o u . In my Toastmasters club, we do impromptu speaking at every meeting. S o m e o n e will ask a random question such as "If y o u could change anything about yourself, w h a t w o u l d it be and w h y ? " Then y o u must immediately get up and give a o n e - to two-minute speech on that topic in front of the group. Your goal isn't to give a perfect presentation off the top of your head. Instead, the idea is to build confidence speaking in front of people. W h e n y o u can s u m m o n the courage to speak in front of a group with no preparation, it makes prepared speaking that much easier. The courage y o u build in one area of your life will also spill over into other areas. D o n ' t allow the courage requirement to dissuade y o u from form- ing powerful new habits, especially those that involve interacting with other people. Follow the path with a heart, even w h e n it compels y o u to face tremendous personal challenges. Honor your deepest connec- tions, and let your conscience be your guide. Habits and Intelligence Consciously cultivate the most authentic habits y o u c a n . For each habit y o u consider, ask yourself: Is this really me? Is this consistent with the person I most want to be? If any part of your life feels phony and inauthentic to y o u , it needs to be replaced with a more genuine alter- native. This w o n ' t be easy, but it is correct. Your ultimate goal in this area is to create a set of mutually sup- portive habits that synergistically increase your alignment with truth, love, and power. G o o d habits enable y o u to remain in a positive flow state while y o u focus on creative self-expression. You consciously make the high-level decisions, and your habits take care of the low-level details. W h e n your habits work together so congruently, the result is both beautiful and elegant. You may never reach this ideal within your lifetime, but every step y o u take in this direction is worthwhile. 158 Habits > O n e of my best decisions ever w a s to make a daily habit of work- ing on my personal g r o w t h . First I started reading self-help books and listening to audio programs; then I began conducting my o w n growth experiments. Later, I formed an online community to explore personal growth with other people. Although I experienced failures and setbacks along the way, the habit of trying to improve myself just a little bit each day has been incredibly rewarding. Success in this area has nothing to do with external accomplish- ments. True success is being able to look at yourself in the mirror and be completely at peace with w h a t y o u see. W h e n your habits are aligned with truth, love, and power, the guy in the glass is your friend. • • Expect to invest a lot of time and energy working on your habits. M o s t of your personal growth efforts will likely be directed at breaking old patterns or forming n e w ones. Your habits put your results on a u - topilot, so y o u need to ensure that those results are aligned with w h a t y o u w a n t . W h a t sense does it make to pursue your greatest dreams if your daily habits will only sabotage y o u ? If y o u w a n t to live more consciously, y o u must consciously cultivate good habits. Despite the difficult challenges you'll face in this area, working on it gives y o u tremendous leverage. O n e n e w habit can permanently alter the course of your life for the better. In the final analysis, the rewards justify the required effort. G o o d habits will support y o u well in all areas of your life, including your health, your relationships, and obviously y o u r . . . • • • • 159 Chapter 9 "Work is love mode visible. — KAHLIL G I B R A N • Think of your career as your primary outlet for creative self- expression. Your career may take the form of an income-generating job y o u perform or a business y o u m a n a g e , but it doesn't have to. Your career is your occupation; at a very basic level, it's simply w h a t y o u do to occupy y o u r time. Of course if you're going to live c o n - sciously, this choice becomes a rather important o n e . Your career has t w o components: your medium and your mes- sage. Most people think of their careers in terms of the m e d i u m , w h i c h is the specific method y o u use to express yourself. For example, y o u could say that I'm a writer, speaker, or blogger, since those represent 161 PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT FOR SMART PEOPLE some of the media outlets I use to express myself. M o s t job titles are defined in terms of expressive media, including doctors, lawyers, po- lice officers, teachers, pilots, and so o n . T h e message of your career is at least as important as the m e d i u m . Your medium is how y o u express yourself, but your message is what y o u express. My message is about consciously growing as a h u m a n being, but I can express that same message through different media. I can write about it, speak about it, or even make a movie about it if I w a n t e d to. S o m e o n e else could use these same media to express an entirely different message. For example, a doctor's message could be about healing, compassion, scientific discovery, education, vitality, or a variety of other possibilities. Just because t w o people share a similar medium doesn't mean that they share the same message. Very often people identify themselves with the medium of their careers. This is a huge mistake. Your medium is merely a shell; it c a n - not define y o u as a person. You can expect that your career medium will change over time, but your message will be m u c h more stable. Your message is w h o y o u are, while your medium is simply h o w y o u choose to express yourself. Years ago, I chose to express myself through the medium of g a m e development. Today I prefer writing and speaking. M a n y years from now, I may be doing something entirely different, but my underlying message of conscious growth is unlikely to change m u c h . Similarly, your true career path is about your message, not your m e d i u m . In this chapter, you'll explore career development in great detail, paying attention to both your medium and your message. To have a fulfilling career, y o u must identify your core message and adopt an appropriate medium for expressing it. Unless y o u ' r e already ridicu- lously passionate about your current situation, there's a g o o d chance that your medium is a poor match for your message. If y o u simply fell into your current line of work, y o u may need to make significant changes to realign yourself with truth, love, and power. Correcting such problems w o n ' t be easy, but y o u should know by n o w that I w o n ' t let y o u settle for less than y o u deserve. 162 |
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