Ielts essay Clinic Targeted Feedback pdf 2 Your Main Body Paragraphs

Examiner Feedback- Overall, this is quite a good example because it does 
provide evidence that supports the main point. However, linguistic errors do 
cause problems for the reader. 
22
© 2021 IELTS Advantage 
All rights reserved

---

People from the local community often find these attractions too 
expensive to visit. This is because there is often an entrance fee charged 
to attend and there is also the added cost of transportation and 
refreshments. These expenses can often be very difficult to afford for 
someone on a low salary when compared to a tourist who has the money 
to go and visit different countries. For example, the Churchill War Rooms 
in London cost around £20 to enter, on top of the high cost of transport 
in the city, meaning most guests are not from the UK.
VIP Student Sample
© 2021 IELTS Advantage All 
rights reserved
23